Rest in me, says the Lord.
I’m having a hard time doing that. Hard? No, that’s not quite right. I’m a writer, let me pick a different word—a power word—a word that really describes how hard of a time I’m having.
How about impossible?
I’m having an impossible time resting in You, Lord.
My life is swirling, moving forward, requiring my time, thought and attention. I live with four people who call me wife, mother, driver, cook, laundress, teacher, counselor, organizer. On the side—is four to six hours a day really on the side?—I pour out words on the page. Trying to start a career at forty. Trying to bless others with my struggles. Trying to learn to be better, stronger, faster.
Strangled. There’s another word. Today I feel strangled. I love what I do. All of it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t do it. I have no problem quitting things I hate. If I’m being honest, I should remove cook from my list of jobs above. More like prepar-er. Or drive thru-er. Since I try to avoid the kitchen as much as possible.
Today I read Psalms 1: 1–6 (NIV).
1 Blessed is the one
who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
or sit in the company of mockers,
2 but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,
and who meditates on his law day and night.
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
whatever they do prospers.
4 Not so the wicked!
They are like chaff
that the wind blows away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
6 For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.
I love verse 3. The idea of being planted by a stream that doesn’t dry up, no matter how I’m feeling or what life has thrown at me, comforts me. I am going to hold onto that today. And maybe tomorrow.
If you’re feeling strangled, desperate for rest, I pray you find The Stream and plant yourself next to Him, dig in deep, grow some roots. And let God love on you today like I’m going to let Him love on me.
Thank you for knowing just what I need. Every day. Every hour. Every minute. Don’t let me miss out on any of Your blessings because I’m so busy not resting that I miss them.
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About Lori Freeland
Lori Freeland, a freelance writer from the Dallas area, holds a bachelor's degree in psychology from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In her other life, the one BK—before kids—she has worked as a social worker and a certified dyslexic reading tutor. Currently, she embraces her status as full-time homeschool mom to three awesome children. Her big dream? Becoming a Young Adult novelist, a goal she diligently pursues during the wee hours of the morning with help from a very large mug of coffee and occasionally some chocolate-covered peanuts. In addition to blogging and contributing regular inspirational articles to Crosswalk.com, The Christian Pulse, and Believe.com, she loves to mentor new writers and encourage people to share their life stories. As a member of the Cancer Mom club, she desires to connect with others in hopes of giving support to those struggling down the messy paths of life. You can find her hanging with the North Texas Christian Writers as a Critique Group Leader and Writing Coach or cheering on her writers on the Faith Team at The Christian Pulse where she recently took on the role of editor. She also loves to attend Society for Children's Book Writers and Illustrators meetings where she has begun a critique workshop for new writers. You can visit her website at LAFREELAND.COM.
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