John Piper waited forty years to write a book on marriage. It is only after forty years of marriage that he felt like he would have something valuable to say (or something valuable to add to a very crowded genre of book). “Romance, sex, and childbearing are temporary gifts of God. They are not part of the next life. And they are not guaranteed even for this life. They are one possible path through the narrow way to Paradise. Marriage passes through breathtaking heights and through swamps with choking vapors. It makes many things sweeter, and with it come bitter providences.” Four decades of sweetness and bitter providences stand behind this book.

Though I am tempted to say that no generation needs to be reminded of a biblical theology of marriage more than our own, I suspect that hundreds of generations past would disagree, saying that their generation is as desperately in need of God’s wisdom. In the book’s opening pages, Piper writes of the cultural distortion of marriage, a distortion that sees marriage as little more than temporary convenience that lasts only as long as the romantic feelings remain. He does so “in the hopes that it might wake you up to consider a vision of marriage higher and deeper and stronger and more glorious than anything this culture—or perhaps you yourself—ever imagined. The greatness and glory of marriage is beyond our ability to think or feel without divine revelation and without the illumining and awakening work of the Holy Spirit.” The book is built upon this foundation: that marriage is God’s doing. It is the doing of God and it is the display of God.

“The aim of this book is to enlarge your vision of what marriage is. As Bonhoeffer says, it is more than your love for each other. Vastly more. Its meaning is infinitely great. I say that with care. The meaning of marriage is the display of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his people.” Marriage, then, is a parable, a gracious, glorious parable given by God, that tells of the permanence of Christ’s commitment to his people.

The point Piper makes time and time again is this: “Marriage is patterned after Christ’s covenant relationship to his redeemed people, the church. And therefore, the highest meaning and the most ultimate purpose of marriage is to put the covenant relationship of Christ and his church on display. That is why marriage exists. If you are married, that is why you are married. If you hope to be, that should be your dream.” Thus staying married is not about staying in love but about keeping covenant; getting divorced involves not just breaking a covenant with a spouse but misrepresenting Christ and his covenant. His understand depends, obviously, on a reading of Ephesians 5:32 that sees marriage primarily as a metaphor for Christ and the church. There are some biblical interpreters who would seem to disagree; if I read them properly it seems that many, perhaps mostly of the Presbyterian tradition, would reverse the two, saying that the relationship of Christ and his church helps us understand marriage rather than the other way around. Though I am not entirely convinced one way or the other, I do think Piper makes a sound argument. Even without standing one hundred percent behind it, I found great value in the book.