Samantha Reed

August 12, 2011

Unlovable
Samantha Reed, Executive Assistant

"Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away." Song of Solomon 8:7a (NIV 1984)

"I'm unloveable."

How many times has this thought consumed your mind? It swirls powerfully, like muddy rapids. Thrashing heart and mind round and round like a toy boat in a damaging river of doubt, fear and lies.

The "I'm unlovable" thought often tosses us from one painful situation to the next.

Rejection from a parent leads to a heart desperate to fill the void that leads to an unloving abusive relationship. A broken heart is patched up with food that leads to weight gain that makes us feel less than beautiful and unworthy of love.

The bruised parts of our hearts can lead us down dark alleys littered with regrets and sadness.

I don't assume to know the tongue lashings, torturous words or deeds, and taunts you've endured. I don't know what rejections, rudeness, or raw aches have slayed your heart. I don't know what choices you've made—what choices were made for you—that pushed you into the roaring rush of this river that tries to drag you down with lies and pain.

I only know this—you will drown in that river unless you grab hold of this safety rope: You are loveable.

Yes. You. You are loveable.

There is an all loving Creator who is sovereign. This is a big word with bigger meaning: all powerful. He had the choice to concoct you in His mind. He had the option to create you. He had the wherewithal to call you by name. He didn't have to.

He could have said,
Nah, I know how that one turns out.
Depression and doubts are her go-to's instead of Me.
Guys are allowed to violate her body.
Her marriage falls apart.
Her relationship with her parents isn't good.
Her kids can't stand her.
She's frumpy.
She's not worthy of My time or talent.
She's not lovable.

But He didn't. No.

Instead, He said,
I know how that one turns out.
She trusts me despite her teetering emotions and difficult circumstances.
She redeems her past to inspire purity in young girls.
She encourages and invests in other's marriages.
It's My delight to be her Father and call her My daughter.
Her knees hit the ground in fervent prayer for her children.
She's beautiful.
She's worthy of my Son's life and death.
She's so lovable, I call her Mine and nothing she does—nothing that happens to her—can take My love from her.

I don't know why you don't feel you're lovable. Or what lies come trying to convince you that your past, your actions, your shame, your guilt disqualifies you from love.

What I do know is this: you are worthy of love. You are loveable. And you are qualified as a child of God. But don't take my word. Take His...

This is what the LORD says: '[Insert your name] who survives [insert what makes you feel unlovable] will find favor in the desert; I will come to give rest to [her].' The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: 'I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness. I will build [Insert your name] up again and you will be rebuilt.'" (Jeremiah 31:2-4a, NIV 1984)

Dear Lord, I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made! Thank You for knowing me fully and loving me completely. Please help me know...truly know...I am loveable. Thank You for the freedom You give from the hurt and lies. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
Do You Know Him?

Partner with us and Compassion International to share God's love and lift a child out of the "I'm unlovable" river. Click here to sponsor a child!

In her book, A Confident Heart, Renee Swope shows us how to live in the promise of God's Love, and find security knowing that HIS LOVE will never fail, even if we do. Click here to find out more.

Visit Samantha's blog for more encouragement and enter to win a copy of A Confident Heart by Renee Swope.

Application Steps:
Write a love letter to the Lord, thanking Him for all the ways He has shown His love to you. Remind yourself of these ways God has shown His love for you when you feel unlovable.

Reflections:
What sin, shame, doubt or fear am I holding onto that cause me to feel unlovable?

Do I need to forgive someone, or myself, for what happened that left me feeling unlovable?

Power Verses:
Micah 7:18, "Who is a God like You, who pardons iniquity And passes over the rebellious act of the remnant of His possession? He does not retain His anger forever, Because He delights in unchanging love." (NASB)

© 2011 by Samantha Reed. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105
www.Proverbs31.org