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<< Living Free Every Day

Living Free - Oct. 14, 2008

  • 2008 Oct 14
  • COMMENTS

Today's Scripture
"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7 NIV

Thoughts for Today
Enablers work hard to shield their loved ones from the consequences of self-destructive choices. As a result, the enabler brings pain upon themselves that really belongs to their loved one.

In their well-intentioned efforts to help, enablers may:

  • lie for their loved one  
  • allow abusive behaviors  
  • hide the truth from relatives and friends  
  • defend their loved one when others point out problems  
  • help them with legal difficulties  
  • change the home environment to accommodate the person with the problem  
  • refuse to discuss the problem with anyone 

Consider this…
It is difficult to stop enabling a loved one because we don't like to admit that we have no power to change another person. As we take on responsibility—and control—of our loved one, our focus is on "fixing" them. But only God can transform lives. This is a God-size problem, not one we can fix. And we need to step back, to give our worry and anxiety to God, and to trust him.

If we don't come to the realization that we have no power to change another person, enabling will progress to a condition known as codependency. Codependents take ownership of another person's problems, get their sense of well-being from managing the behavior of the dependent person, and end up being controlled by the person they are trying to help.

Prayer
Father, forgive me for trying to take your place in my loved one's life. I realize now that I cannot change anyone's life. Only the power of Jesus can do that. I commit my loved one to you. I pray that he will turn to you for help in making right choices. In Jesus' name …

These thoughts were drawn from…
Living Free
by Jimmy Ray Lee, D.Min. and Dan Strickland, M.Div. Using Living Free training, your church or ministry can unleash a new kind of group leader—one who understands how tough life can be, but also knows the hope and freedom found in Christ.

Visit our website to read more about this study and learn more about Living Free small groups.  

 

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© Living Free 2007. Living Free is a registered trademark. Living Free Every Day devotionals may be reproduced for personal use. When reproduced to share with others, please acknowledge the source as Living Free, Chattanooga, TN. Must have written permission to use in any format to be sold. Permission may be requested by sending e-mail to
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