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She Seeks - Week of April 7

  • 2014 Apr 07
  • COMMENTS

{what to do when life breaks you}
an entry. that's all.

It was a hard year. Heart-stompin' hard.

A dream I nurtured for ten years went up in flames. This hope wasn't a passing flight-of-fancy. It was a promise I fully believed was from the Lord.

Staying the course and believing for so long was exhausting. {And thrilling.} Yet in a flash my dream died. My heart was burned and the ashes seemed a proper place to fall.

Sad and unresponsive to encouragement, I stayed there a long, long time. My hands {emptied of hope} filled with fists of ashes.

I knew I needed to get up; I just couldn't muster the elusive 'oomph' to do it. Grief was the only emotion that felt natural; comfortable.

Yet I knew, wallowing in the embers would be the death of me as well. And here's the sweet thing: God knew this too. He unwaveringly kneeled next to me, extending a helping-hand up. He promised: This isn't the end. Give Me the ashes; I'll do something with them. Something beautiful.

He spoke this message in hundreds of ways. But it wasn't until He was silent that I heard Him at a concert.

It was barely noticeable. Permanently engraved on the girl's foot in front of me, the swirly feminine font contrasted with dark masculine ink: Beauty for ashes.

And there He was. This God of redemption and resurrection, speaking His timeless message once again. For me. For you. Give Me the ashes; I'll do something with them. Something beautiful.

That was several years ago. I'd love to tie this up with a pretty bow. Say that I unclenched my fists; gave God the soot. Have been happy-go-lucky since then. But I won't. Cause I can't.

I want to be real. And real is the fact that it's taken every day between then and now to see redeeming qualities from the heartbreak. To be honest, I still don't see much beauty from such devastation.

But like I said, I want to be real. And real is also my commitment to God.

To take Him at His Word, despite circumstances.
To believe He a creative Creator.
To hope for what is unseen.

I'll continue to look for His goodness, even if it's from a pile of ashes. Because truly, the most beautiful thing these years and this pain have shown me is a faithful God. One who stands by. One who redeems - all things. One who creates masterpieces out of muck.

A God who took the most hopeless situation and the ultimate death ... and resurrected hope. Resurrected our Hope: Jesus. And there is the spark we need to light a new fire in us to Give Me the ashes; I'll do something with them. Something beautiful.

Something Else . . .
"The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see." {Hebrews 11:1}

Gungor Beautiful Things

Samantha Reed is saying "yes" to the Lord this year. Yes to getting out of the ashes, to hope, to beauty. Join her here!

Check in with Samantha over at She Seeks.

© 2012 by Samantha Reed. All rights reserved.

www.SheSeeks.org
A Division of Proverbs 31 Ministries

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