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It's No Secret - She Seeks - Week of August 19

  • 2013 Aug 19
  • COMMENTS

{it's no secret}

20-something girlfriend advice from author, Rachel Olsen

In recent years, I have been fortunate to have some girlfriends who are a tad bit older than me pour into my life and freely offer up advice and encouragement. It means so much to me that they take the time out of their busy days to fill me in on life lessons. But I have not always had these girlfriend-mentors in my life.

As I navigated through my twenties, I wish I had a girlfriend to pass along to me little tidbits of life secrets.

Age 20: I needed to know that going off to college was not an excuse to go crazy.

Age 25: I needed to know that wearing super high heels every single day to work would mess up my feet.

Age 27: I needed to know that the true way to find my purpose was to let the LORD lead me into my future.

Enter Rachel Olsen, the author of It's No Secret: Revealing Divine Truths Every Woman Should Know (David C. Cook 2011). Rachel is that girlfriend I wish I had around to share the not-so-secret divine truths of the Bible to me during my 20's. Some of them, shared in her book are: handling conflict biblically, how we grow through life drama, and the importance of getting rest.

I asked Rachel to tell us one divine secret that she wished she had unlocked and lived out in her twenties. Here was her response:

What I wish I could tell my 22 year-old self is, 'When you stop trying to create a life for yourself, you'll find the life God creates for you. And when you stop trying to elevate yourself and humble yourself instead, God will lift you up.' It is the secret power of humility, and it requires that I learn to override my selfish, competitive impulses.

Throughout my twenties I felt I was in a race — the proverbial rat race, I guess. I felt in competition with the world at large. I felt pressured and driven to get ahead, prove myself, make my mark and grab my share of the good life before it's too late.

It was hard for me to be happy for other people's successes because I thought it meant that I was falling behind. There seemed to be a limited amount of "the good life," so I figured the more they got, the less for me. I didn't want to help anyone get ahead unless it somehow benefited me, as well.

You might get the impression from this confession that I am uber-competitive. I'm really not. It's just that I wasn't looking at myself as part of the body of Christ. Nor was I fully surrendering to Him.

I have a note card taped up by my desk with this note-to-self: "The secret of true gospel change is being convinced that Jesus is the good life and the source of my joy." It's when I lose sight of this that I start comparing, competing and selling out to things not worth selling out to.

So I'd want to tell my younger self there is great relief in laying all that down at the cross and trusting God with my career, income, family and status — that when we willingly humble ourselves, God truly does lift us up. Humility and service, I've found, lead me into a very good life.

This is such valuable advice from Rachel. How many times have I found myself expressing outwardly my happiness for a co-worker's promotion, but on the inside I was disappointed that I didn't get the job? How often do we as women smile and compliment another women's shoes, but entertain a small amount of jealousy in our heart at the same time? I'm just glad Rachel was so honest and that I'm not alone in my need for more humility toward others and toward the Lord.

As your online girlfriends who love you, we seek to let you know weekly that you are not alone in whatever struggle you may have. To further encourage you, we are thrilled to get to offer you, this week, a signed copy of Rachel Olsen's It's No Secret! Simply answer the question below in the comments section and a winner will be randomly selected at the end of the day on Friday.

~ What is one thing you wish an older girlfriend would share with you as you navigate through your twenties?

Leave answer here to be entered into the giveaway!

Resources...

It's No Secret

Rachel Olsen's website

Join other women in an online study of It's No Secret

Sarah Martin loves her online girlfriends! Check out her new Facebook community and join in for weekly encouragement and community with other young adult women.

Check in with Sarah and Rachel over at She Seeks.

© 2011 by Sarah Martin. All rights reserved.

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