Marriage Advice From A Christian Perspective

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How Divorce Can Open the Door to Adultery and Destruction

How Divorce Can Open the Door to Adultery and Destruction

One of the reasons I believe adultery is so common in America and in the Church is because divorce is so common in America and in the Church.

There is a standard Jesus calls us to live by and as believers, I think we have become desensitized to the dangers of divorce.

Jesus told us, “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’  But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.” (Matthew 5.31-32 NKJV)

Regardless of the multitudes of circumstances, as I completely understand everyone has a story behind the reasons for ending their marriage, divorce is not God’s will.

Not only does divorce tear apart marriages and families, it opens up a door for the spirits of lust and adultery to be ever-present and active in the home.

To say the least, adultery, which is born out of covetness, envy, and selfishness, is utterly destructive. Those actions in any home will continue to reap a harvest of terrible ramifications, and the enemy will continue to steal, kill, and destroy if you allow him to.

How do I know?

Because I experienced two divorces in my family, and the spirits of adultery and lust were active and allowed the enemy to bring more destruction and devastation with strife, depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts.

The cause of the second divorce in my family was none other than, you guessed it, adultery. With both parties, actually.

The enemy doing what he does best: robbing, ripping apart, and even murdering.

I can't help but wonder if this spirit of adultery that plagued my family also had a hand in the murder of my father outside of a strip club. No matter if it was or wasn't, the enemy was at the center.

Furthermore, if the spirit of adultery is active in a family and a door is opened over a child's life, they too may struggle with those sinful and lustful thoughts that Jesus warns us of in Matthew 5:

 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’  But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5.27-28 NKJV)

It is all the matter of the heart and if adultery is in the heart, it is only a matter of time before it becomes words in the mouth, and then actions being lived out.

Being subjected to a lustful and adulterous environment, a door of perversion was opened very early on in my life, and it wasn't a coincidence that I too would be somehow involved in the sin of adultery, among other evil entanglements. At the age of 19, I "fell in love" with a married man, became physically involved with him, and spent years trying to sever my soul from that man. After that experience, I started on a downward spiral into a deep, lonely pit of sexual bondage ridden with countless soul-ties with random men, anxiety, depression, alcohol abuse, and bi-sexual behavior. Thank God my eyes were opened to my sinful and selfish existence and I repented of all of sins, and committed my life to the Lord Jesus Christ. He delivered me from all of the confusion and lust and healed all of the (self-inflicted) wounds in my soul.

Just like in my life, we see sexual immorality and lust running rampant in so many lives in today’s society, especially in the lives of our youth, and I have to wonder if the root of the issue can be traced back to divorce opening up that door to sexual perversion. This is a question I believe we need to be asking ourselves and praying about before we follow through with ending our marriages.

I believe there are many reasons God hates divorce, one being the staining of the reflection of the marriage of Jesus and His Bride, but I'm sure the fact that it is adultery in Jesus' eyes is probably one of the most important reasons. He's trying to protect your children and generations to come from experiencing the sinful and painful cycle in their lives.

Divorce destroys hearts, lives, and families.

Adultery destroys hearts, lives, and families.

Divorce without reason from sexual immorality is adultery is God's eyes.

But the good news, my friends, is that the Blood of Jesus washes away all of those sins and we can find forgiveness. When we repent of those sins and fully embrace the work of the Cross, washed in that precious Blood of the Lamb, the Father sees Jesus' ultimate sacrifice and not our sin any longer. And if you've been wounded by divorce or adultery, the Lord offers us healing in His own wounds:

But he was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed. 
(Isaiah 53:5)

Jesus died for you so you could then live for Him and not yourself.

While the enemy promises to steal, kill, and destroy, Jesus promises that if you live for Him, you will have life to the fullest, until it overflows! (Paraphrase John 10:10)

Repent, receive the message of the Cross today, and truly live! 

emily-headshot Emily Rose Massey began writing short stories and poetry as a little girl, entered the blogging world in her early 20's, and recently released her first book, Yielded in His Hands (eLectio Publishing). She enjoys being a stay-at-home momma and serving in her local church with her husband in television, worship, and youth ministry. Believing she has been forgiven of much, she loves much, and desires to point others to Christ and His redemptive and transforming power. If you would like to connect with Emily or learn more about her book, you can visit her website: www.emilyrosemassey.com