Editor's Note: Read about the other 9 Commandments of Marriage in Part I of this series: The 10 Commandments of Marriage 

The seventh commandment brings us to one of the most vital principles of having the marriage God intends.  Exodus 20:14 simply says,

“You shall not commit adultery.”

In a marriage, you would be hard pressed to imagine anything more damaging than your spouse being unfaithful.  But being faithful is not only being faithful in action, but also in thought.

Again, Jesus expanded on this in Matthew 5, and I want you to read these words very carefully.  He said, “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’  But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

Having a lustful, exploitive disposition has no place in marriage.  Love gives; lust takes.  Love serves; lust demands.  Love nourishes; lust chokes.

What a wonderful gift God has given us in this thing called sex.  It was His idea.  It is just as holy as when you lift your hands in church and worship Him.  It is God’s idea within the context and the confines of marriage.  It should be enjoyed.

But lust has no place in marriage.  It is a poison that will destroy the fabric of your relationship with your spouse.

Men, do not even entertain the thought of allowing pornography into your life.  It can destroy your marriage.  You are committing heart-adultery when you look at pornographic images and lust after another woman.  Do not let the devil have that ground in your heart and life.

This is such a vital command, we are going to stay on this subject for a little longer.  I will share with you three ways to affair-proof your marriage.

Affair-Proof Your Marriage with Positive Affirmation

The first way to affair-proof your marriage is to season your marriage with affirming communication.

In Song of Solomon 7:1-6 we read of how Solomon affirmed his bride,

How beautiful are your feet in sandals, O prince’s daughter!  The curves of your thighs are like jewels, the work of the hands of a skillful workman.  Your navel is a rounded goblet; it lacks no blended beverage.  Your waist is a heap of wheat set about with lilies.  Your two breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle.  Your neck is like an ivory tower, your eyes like the pools in Heshbon by the gate of Bath Rabbim.  Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon which looks toward Damascus.  Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel, and the hair of your head is like purple; a king is held captive by your tresses.  How fair and how pleasant you are, O love, with your delights!

Solomon knew it was vital for him to compliment his bride’s body, because, as you read in chapter 1, it is evident that it was an area of insecurity for her.

This Shulamite was a country girl.  She said, “Do not look on me for I am dark.”  She was tan from working out in the vineyards.  And compared with the fair-skinned, pampered ladies of the court, she felt very insecure.

So Solomon very wisely builds her up in the area where she feels most insecure.

Speak affirming words to your mate rather than tear him or her down.  If your spouse is starved for positive affirmation, and it does not come from you, it opens a door of temptation.  The devil will send someone to give insincere compliments, and if a person is starved for it, they gravitate towards it.

Praise one another lavishly.  It is an important thing to do.

Affair-Proof Your Marriage with Companionship