So whether you have asked the Lord to come into your life now or have received him in the past, you are still forgiven for your past, present and future sins. What is now important is you forgive yourself. I know it sounds easier than it is. From personal experience there are some things I have had a hard time letting go of. There are some things that I can't believe God would forgive me for. But please know, without this acceptance of God's grace, it will be difficult to heal and to move forward.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well (Matthew 6:33).

As you grow in the Lord, as you seek Christ in all things, as you go to church, serve, and read your Bible (and make sure your new man is doing the same, as it's critical that you are equally yoked), God will slowly change you from the inside out. You will become a new creation in all ways. The past will simply be the past. One day you will be able to tell others of what God has done, just like me. Your past won't hold you hostage anymore. You will be free.

All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name (Acts 10:43).

HE is … Cliff Young, a Crosswalk.com contributing writer and a veteran single of many decades. He has traveled the world in search of fresh experiences, serving opportunities, and the perfect woman (for him) and has found that his investments in God, career and youth ministry have paid off in priceless dividends.

SHE is … Kris Swiatocho, the President and Director of TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries and FromHisHands.com Ministries. Kris has served in ministry in various capacities for the last 25 years. An accomplished trainer and mentor, Kris has a heart to reach and grow leaders so they will in turn reach and grow others. She is the author of three books: Singles and Relationships: A 31-Day Experiment (co-authored with Dick Purnell of Single Life Resources); From the Manger to the Cross: The Women in Jesus' Life; and the most recent, Jesus, Single Like Me with Study Questions (includes a leader's guide and conference/retreat of the same name).

DISCLAIMER: We are not trained psychologists or licensed professionals. We're just average folk who understand what it's like to live the solo life in the twenty-first century. We believe that the Bible is our go-to guide for answers to all of life's questions, and it's where we'll go for guidance when responding to your questions. Also, it's important to note that we write our answers separately.

GOT A QUESTION? If you've got a question about anything related to singleness or living the single life, please submit it to hesaid-shesaid@crosswalk.com (selected questions will be posted anonymously). While we are unable to answer every inquiry, we do hope that this column will be an encouragement to you. Click here to visit the He Said-She Said archives.

Publication date: May 9, 2013