Recognizing the Man of Your Dreams
- Friday, April 15, 2005
How do other people view him? Boaz was well-respected and loved by not only his family, but also by his employees and those in high standing in the community. Does the man in your life have long-standing, committed relationships with his friends and associates? What about his friends? Do you like them? Know that he acts just like his friends when his is not around you. What do his coworkers or employees say about him? Do they speak highly of him and commend his character and integrity? Or do they make jokes about his shortcomings? This is a big giveaway. Is his family life filled with drama and misunderstanding, or does he walk in harmony with his siblings and parents, especially his mother? A man who loves his mother is an excellent prospect for a husband. Some of these things will take time to find out, but keep them in mind.
Now, on to the pursuit. After inquiring about Ruth, Boaz then approached her. She did not approach him. I know popular-day date-ology says men like women who have the confidence to approach them. Why? Because men have a greater fear of rejection than we do. However, they are also programmed to pursue, so this can be a delicate matter. The truth, after a bit of prying, is that they like to make the advance but would also appreciate a sign from the woman that the coast is clear to do so.
Positive signs you could send a man would be in the form of your body language. A pleasant smile and eye contact is plenty – just enough to let him know you noticed him, too, and are interested. Then, let him do his thing. Do not be so uptight when he approaches. Relax and enjoy the conversation. Remember, you are a fabulous jewel. Believe it and sparkle. Be interested in him and do not bowl him over with too much information about yourself. Listen, be observant, check him out. That first conversation will tell you a lot about him. Is he short on words, but sweet? Then he probably is shy and has good intentions. Is he a little too sure of himself and has all the right lines? Watch this one a little closer and make no emotional investment. After exchanging numbers, how long does it take him to call? If it takes weeks, he has unfinished business elsewhere. Listen to his excuse and see if it rings true to you, but be careful. The average man who is really interested will call within two to three days to see if he can arrange a time for you to get together.
I wouldn't call this a date yet, because nothing has been carved in stone. There have been no promises – nothing is guaranteed. This is what they call in the modeling world a "go-see." You are going out to see if you like one another, that is all. You have way too much data to collect before you even decide if you like him. What you see is not necessarily what you get, so leave your heart at home. Now is not the time to give it away.
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Taken from "Ending the Search for Mr. Right" by Michelle McKinney Hammond; Copyright 2005 by Michelle McKinney Hammond; Published by Harvest House Publishers, Eugene, OR; Used by Permission.
Michelle McKinney Hammond, a writer, singer, and speaker who focuses on improving love–driven relationships, is the founder and president of HeartWing Ministries as well as the co-host of the Emmy nominated show "Aspiring Women." Michelle is the author of "The DIVA Principle™", "101 Ways to Get and Keep His Attention"," Sassy, Single, & Satisfied", "Secrets of an Irresistible Woman", "What to Do Until Love Finds You", "Get a Love Life", and "The Power of Being a Woman."
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