As a financial planner, I used to recommend that couples carry a minimal amount of insurance on the non-working spouse; just enough to cover the cost of funeral expenses, daycare/nanny, cleaning service, etc.  You see, I always viewed life insurance simply as an income replacement tool for a wage earner.  That is, until I met John and the other two widowers.  In my flawed thinking, John’s bride didn’t have an income so her death shouldn’t affect their financial quality of life.  It was only after his bride’s death, when John was forced to choose between financial and emotional security for his children that one could see the intangible ways that her loss would impact his family’s quality of life.  It wasn’t just their mother that was gone; it was the loss of life as they knew it. Children, especially those facing a tragic loss, crave consistency and stability; the loss of their mother rocked their world. 

You see, John had plenty of insurance on his own life.  In the event of his death, his bride could have continued the full time care of his children while still having financial stability. Yes, the loss of their father would have hurt deeply, but their day to day lives would have, for the most part, remained consistent and stable providing a sense of security in an insecure time. 

Now, when I advise couples in situations where one is considered a non-working spouse, I think of John, his children and the difficult decision he had to make.  I encourage them to make sure that not only will their family be financially secure in the event of either spouse’s death, but that they will be emotionally and spiritually secure as well.  Therefore, I am now recommending that couples base their life insurance decision on the potential loss of income of the working spouse in the event the non-working spouse dies.  And with insurance rates at all time lows, almost everyone can afford the coverage.