And let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. (Hebrews 10:24-25)
Again, what a great model for restoring your most precious but injured relationship. Just as you strengthen your ties with the church family by "not forsaking...assembling together," you need to make a similar recommitment to let your spouse know you mean business when it comes to your marriage. If I want to communicate this message to Becky, it might sound like this: "Honey, let's get our schedules back under control. Let's spend more time together. Help me be the kind of husband I need to be." That's what it means to work on the relationship.
Whether you're on the giving end of grace or the one receiving it, you're engaged in one of life's most arduous assignments. When we've been wronged, forgiveness runs absolutely counter to our nature. It's like the dentist telling you to relax as he's about to drill a cavity into your tooth. Your natural response is to grip the arms of the chair and hang on for dear life. And when we've injured the one we love, a battle rages within as we try to rationalize our behavior and minimize our responsibility. The idea of coming clean and throwing ourselves at the mercy of the one we've offended, expecting nothing in return, flies in the face of our senses of pride and self-preservation. But according to the Creator's flight plan, its' the only way to go.
Adapted from "Different By Design" by H. Dale Burke © 2000. Used by special permission of Moody Publishers. For any other use, please contact Moody Publishers for permission. All rights reserved.
