Are you teachable? Do you have an open and receptive heart to instruction? One of the tools I recommend for couples is to doubt themselves. On the face of it this may sound like very strange counsel. However, developing an open heart, receptive to wise counsel, is something requiring practice. Consider doubting yourself. Consider the possibility that the way you see things is only one way of viewing a situation. Reflect upon how the world might look from your mate’s position. Allow him/ her to teach you some things about what it is like to walk in their shoes. This practice will create a new level of connection between the two of you. The Apostle Peter says, “Live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.” (1 Peter 3:8)

Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and Saying It So He'll Listen. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities.