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The Faith of Our Twenty-Somethings

The Faith of Our Twenty-Somethings

Mitali Perkins

Crosswalk.com Contributer

 

"I’ve been called for a purpose, and God has had His hand on me," singer Katy Perry told GO! Magazine when she was seventeen years old. Her parents, Keith and Mary Hudson, are church-planters, evangelists, and pastors.

Now 23, Perry is the voice behind I KISSED A GIRL, a "bi-curious" pop single that's rocketed to the top of the charts, and UR SO GAY, a song that relies on gay stereotyping to express what some have called the singer's "girl power."

Perry also recently cleared up rumors about her ring: "I'm definitely not a virgin!" she said. "[People] think the promise ring means no sex! No, the promise ring is just a promise that he'll get me another ring. A better ring! Seriously, it's not one of those 'no sex' promise rings. That kind of went out the window when I was 17 years old."

Perry isn't unusual when it comes to moving away from her parents' values. Many young people raised in Christian homes reject their parents' faith and morals during their early twenties. Research by the Barna group reveals that "twentysomethings continue to be the most spiritually independent and resistant age group in America."

So what can parents of straying young adults do? Some try to speak into their children's lives with words of wisdom, cashing in the "influence capital" they banked through the easier years. But staying connected isn't easy -- is celebrating any success of a prodigal the equivalent of parental approval? Others threaten to withdraw financial or emotional support as a consequence, hoping to force their kids to "do the right thing."

Basically, there's not much else to do. Except wait and hope and pray and love, which is probably what the Hudsons (Katy Perry's parents) are doing. H. Norman Wright, author of Loving a Prodigal (Chariot Victor Books), recommends a process of grieving, seeking support, and surrender: 

After a while, I think parents simply have to relinquish their child and give him or her to God. This should be the first thing we do, but for many parents, we'll exhaust our own resources before recognizing that God will be the one to bring change. You almost have to detach yourself from the child and realize that you can't control him and bring him back.

Katy Perry was recently quoted in Entertainment Weekly as saying, "I got this Jesus tattoo on my wrist when I was 18, because I know that it's (religion) always going to be a part of me. When I'm playing, it's staring right back at me, saying, 'Remember where you came from.'"

I'm sure her parents are praying that she will.


Mitali Perkins is the author of Ambassador Families: Equipping Your Kids to Engage Popular Culture (Brazos Press). She studied Political Science at Stanford University and Public Policy at U.C. Berkeley, and has written for Christianity Today, Discipleship Journal, Campus Life, With, Prism, War Cry, U.S. Catholic, and other periodicals. Mitali also writes fiction for young readers, including Monsoon Summer (Random House), The Not-So-Star-Spangled Life of Sunita Sen (Little Brown), Rickshaw Girl (Charlesbridge), and the First Daughter books (Dutton). She lives in Massachusetts with her husband and twin sons. Visit Mitali's Blog, Ambassador Families.
Most Recent User Comments
jllf
8/21/2008 12:12 AM
God is good to give us CHOICES to make in life.
At times, when we're strayed, it gives us an opportunity to see what the world has offered. In his Grace and time, God will drawn us back to him, as said - He will not forsaken us!
I believe going through this path of destruction will turn us into better person and make us realized that we're living testimony of such act. This way we can served the community better.
What parents can do is to pray for their children and not to condemn their act. End of the day, God is our planner in life. Sad but this the way we have chosen.
Remember our AMAZING GRACE, how sweet the sound, That sav’d a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found, Was blind, but now I see
marysunkes
8/20/2008 5:28 PM
A link to this article has been posted on the website GoodNewsNow.com.
t_camlatte
8/17/2008 8:45 PM
I think often children, especially those that grow up in church, never really develop their own relationship with God and therefore it truly is their parent's faith. That can be a problem. However, parent's must realize they planted a seed in their child's life, realize that God is in control (release them to God), pray for their child, keep loving them, and confess the Word concerning them. I am a 24 year old, who grew up in church, received Christ and was in a back slidden state between high school and my first year in college. Honestly, I can say God NEVER let me go and He ordered my steps right back to Him. You realize that once you taste of the goodness of the Lord, nothing in this world can compare to it. Be encouraged, and remember God is married to the backslider (Jer 3:14).
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