I'm Attracted to a Non-Christian Girl
Q. Is it a good idea for a believer who is attracted to a non-believer to continue to pursue a growing relationship with that person? A. Yes! (and no ... you knew that was coming.)
Yes ...
As a Christian you should absolutely continue to pursue a growing friendship with that person. How else would your friend get to see what a Christian is like and what it means to allow Jesus to lead your life? By all means, be friends with unbelievers and live in such a way that they are attracted to our awesome God (Matthew 5:16).
No ...
But I don't believe it's a good idea to begin a dating relationship with an unbeliever. And here's why:
You've been chosen by God
John 15:16, 1 Peter 2:9, and 1 Thessalonians 1:4 are just a few verses that point out an amazing truth: Christians have been chosen by God. What a privilege and responsibility! Because we've been chosen by God, we've got to follow His guidelines for our lives, particularly our relationships.
You've been given guidance by God
One of the principles from 2 Corinthians 6:14-17 is that Christians are only to marry Christians. Seems kind of limiting, don't you think? Yes, until you consider that God is a loving God who has your best interest in mind. Think about it. Imagine marrying someone who is not a believer. Maybe she will agree to go to church with you ... but how passionate will she be about seeing you grow in your faith? Will she encourage your involvement in a small group or going to a men's retreat? If so ... for how long? What happens when you have children? Sure, your wife will probably think it's a good idea for them to go to church, but as they get older, they'll be watching your example more than listening to your words (you know how that is) and it will be easy
for them to say, "Mom, you don't care much about God and church, so why
should we?" God looks at the big picture and knows it is in your best interest to be patient and wait for a godly woman to come along.
You're called to grow in your relationship with God
Maybe you're thinking, "C'mon! I'm talking about dating someone ... not
marrying the person!" I understand. But you're also talking about developing habits today for what kind of wife you're looking for tomorrow. Begin practicing healthy habits now ... it'll forever help you in the future. Besides, dating an unbeliever now is opening yourself up to a number of temptations that are tough enough for two Christians to handle. Think about it, what if you have different views on sexuality, or alcohol, or video rentals? Who decides what is right? Where do you begin to compromise?
Besides, you won't have much opportunity to grow through Bible study,
prayer, and other ways to connect with God and each other.
But what about ?
What if I date an unbeliever in order to lead her to Christ? Sure, it can happen and it does. But it happens very rarely. If anyone does change, it's more normal for the Christian to go backwards in his faith. The best statement I've heard on the dating as evangelism issue is, "Since when has effective evangelism happened as a result of willful disobedience?"
Finally, Hebrews 12:1 is a terrific verse on this issue. "We should remove from our lives anything that would get in the way and the sin that so easily holds us back." Dating an unbeliever will hold you back. And it may send a mixed message to the other person as well. Your best bet is to be that person's friend, but don't allow the emotions to draw you into a dating relationship.Page Source (url): http://www.crosswalk.com/510486/