Six Tests To Determe If He's Mr. Right...Continued from page 1

The Mr. Right Test #4: Watch him around other women
For many reasons we won't here delve into (socialization, hormones, insecurity, nature, the desire to confirm that they're as irresistable as they think they are), men flirt. Cool enough; that's probably how you were attracted to your man in the first place. But once you and he have committed to being together exclusively, the only message your man ever needs to be sending any other woman is "I'm Sure You're Very Cute, But Not to Me." Next time the two of you attend a party, separate from him, and then watch him while he's in Solo Socializing mode. If you see him consistently not flirting with batting-eyed beauties, fantastic. If you do see him turning on his Mr. Spectacular show, don't panic. At some point after the party, though, do talk to him--and for real. Tell him how his flirting with other girls hurts your feelings, and -- worse, maybe -- how it does makes you look like a fool. If he sees and understands the truth of that, and so agrees to never flirt again, that's great: relationships are about honing and smoothing. But if, knowing how flirting does and must make you feel, he continues to flirt with other women, then he's being very clear about not only who he is, but about whom he expects you to be.

The Mr. Right Test #5: Watch how he treats service personnel
Waiters, busboys, doormen, janitors, maids, parking attendants, delivery people, store clerks ... a man's character is revealed by how he treats such people in his life. If towards service personnel or those beneath him professionally your man is brusque, dismissive, or in even the slightest way condescending, then as sure as sharks bite he's going to start treating you that way, too. It's just not possible for a man who doesn't treat everyone with respect to respect you. It's a symptom of a problem he has that you're not going to be able to fix. Get out right away, or go down trying.

The Mr. Right Test #6: Watch how he loses
Everyone wins well: in victory, everyone is gracious, magnanimous, humble, sweet, etc. How a guy loses, however, tells you who he is. Be with your man sometime when he loses a game of some sort that he wanted or expected to win. (Bonus points if you're the one who beats him.) Watch very carefully how he responds to defeat. A real winner knows it's about remaining a winner, no matter the score.

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