Finally, we fill in our individual appointments and obligations. This is where I leave space for ministry work, doctor’s appointments, orthodontist appointments, and volunteer obligations. It’s much easier to know when to schedule these if you have clearly defined white space in your calendar. If there is a special project I need to accomplish, I break it down into bite-sized pieces and assign myself parts of the task each day. Some examples of special projects are a closet that needs to be organized, files that need to be updated, photographs that need to be developed and put in albums, or an area of the house that needs to be dejunked with the excess going to charity. Once all of this is in place, I feel the freedom to plan time for me in my schedule. If I want to have coffee with a friend or go on a girl’s night out, I can easily see when it is realistic to make this happen.
Getting my schedule out of my brain and onto a calendar drastically reduces my stress and alleviates the feeling that my schedule is running me rather than the other way around.
Become a Good Delegator
If you cannot get everything done that is required of you, then you have to take an honest assessment with a solution in mind. My solution is to ask for help. I divide my tasks into three categories:
• Only I can do this.
• Someone else can do it under my guidance.
• I can hand this off to someone else freely.
Knowing the difference between these three categories is life-transforming! The first, only I can do this, are obviously those things only I can do. No one else can spend time with the Lord for me. No one else can make the type of emotional investment necessary to be an effective wife and mom for my family. No one else can exercise for me (oh, how I wish they could!). No one else can write my books for me. This first category contains things I make time for by giving other tasks away.
The second category are things that someone else can do under my guidance. The important thing here is to clearly communicate your expectations to the person you are giving a task to and train them to do the job the way you want it done. Once you’ve trained this person and they have learned the job, you can then hand off this task to them freely. The time you invest on the front end training and educating on the right way to accomplish a task will reap great benefits on the back end.
This is where my kids come in. There are lots of household tasks the children are perfectly capable of handling. Also, I have a sitter who helps me run my afternoon carpools. Art and I have decided it is better to give up other things to have the finances to make this possible for my sanity’s sake.
