Jim Daly Christian Blog and Commentary

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How Do You Divvy Up Household Tasks?

  • Jim Daly Jim Daly is president and chief executive officer of Focus on the Family, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping families thrive.
  • Updated Oct 15, 2013

Have you ever noticed that popular culture tends to see fathers as the “second-string” parent?

What do I mean by that?

Consider the familiar storyline in TV sitcoms or movies where the hapless dad can’t handle making his kids dinner or the house looks like a bomb went off because mom goes away for a weekend.

The insinuation is that mom is on the varsity and dad is still finding his way on the JV squad.

To be sure, God created the roles of moms and dads to be both unique and complementary. Our biblical understanding of motherhood is that when it comes to providing a nurturing and warm environment for children, moms are uniquely gifted and equipped to serve in that primary role. Conversely, fathers are instructed to serve in a leadership capacity (Genesis 18:19).

They are different – but equally valuable-functions and certainly there are times when roles overlap. In other words, there is no such thing as a top-tier parent – and no second-string.

You and I know that as moms and dads, we’re in it together.

But when it comes down to the practical side of managing a home, I’m curious how you and your spouse, assuming you’re not a single parent, divvy up all the tasks.

In the Daly household, Jean has stayed home with the boys and manages the myriad of tasks associated with modern-day life. I know not every family is able to pull that off. But because we’ve been fortunate to make it work, Jean does most of the cleaning and cooking, though I love preparing breakfast for the family. When it comes to laundry, I actually enjoy folding and ironing. The years with my step-father, a former Marine drill-sergeant, gave me an appreciation for neatness and order.

What about changing diapers?

Back when the boys were little, it was all hands on deck. If a diaper needed to be changed, whoever was closest and available was tasked with changing it. I can’t say that I enjoyed it, but it certainly didn’t seem fair to leave it all to Jean.

But let me turn the discussion over to you. How do you and your spouse share all the work associated with children and the home?


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