Threatening Leprechauns Respond!
- Updated Mar 18, 2009
Yesterday I wrote St. Patrick: The Benevolent Catholic Leprechauns. And today, from one Lucky Leath Bhro'gan, president of an organization called LUAU (Leprechauns United Against Ulcerousness), I got this:
Dear Mr. Shore:
Ho, ho, ho; hee hee hee
With one kick of my heel
I could shatter your knee.
I'm not likely to do it
Our type's not that mean
Though it would bring us pleasure
To hear how you'd scream.
That last post you wrote
Making fun of St. Paddy?
Made us want to ask you
"Now who's your daddy?"
You thought it was fun
To make light of our hero
How do you sleep,
You absolute zero?
But we are nice folk
forgiving and kind
So we'll let this one go
We'll leave it behind.
But please heed my words:
If you do that once more
You'll find that your shoes
Have been nailed to the floor.
Your bleach will tip over
Your socks disappear
And the gas in your car
Will turn into green beer.
We'll pull up your flowers
Dishevel your yard
You'll find your wood flooring
all terribly marred.
We'll put dirt in your oatmeal
you'll trip when you jog
We'll leave you no doubt
As to who shaved your dog.
If you'd like to avoid this
And sidestep the strife
Just write something decent
For once in your life.
Comment here.
Visit me online at JohnShore.com