Nicki Koziarz Crosswalk blogsite of Nicki Koziarz
- 2013 Sep 16
I had never met this girl before.
Her ears had not heard my God-struggles. Our paths had never crossed. The aches in my soul -she knew nothing of them.
Yet she approached me with a glowing confidence.
“God wants you to just ask Him.”
That’s all she said.
My eye-brows raised, my heart fluttered. Tears filled my eyes.
How did she know?
For days, weeks and even months I had been struggling with my relationship with God. I just wasn’t sure about a lot of things anymore.
Had God really called me to speak? Did He really give me a book idea? Was I crazy to feel like everyone all around me seemed against any and all of my God dreams?
I prayed. I read my Bible. But each time, I had nothing to ask God. The truth was, I was scared. Because, if I asked, then I had to believe God.
How did this girl know I had nothing to ask God?
Who let her into this secret place in my soul?
These questions haunted me throughout the night. The next morning I was cleaning up the kitchen and I came across a note one of my 3 daughter’s had scribbled.
Written in a purple crayon on a pink sticky note, “Did you ask?”
I’m sure it was some meaningless note one sister had passed to another sister. Implying a question like, “Did you ask momma for ice-cream?” or “Did you ask if we have to do the dishes?”
But I paused in this very unlikely moment, sensing the Lord was using this note to give me the courage to…ask.
And so, last week I walked boarded a plane. I flew up the East Coast. Sat next to strangers. Drank Starbucks. And…asked God, a lot of things.
I was heading to speak at event. But I sensed God wanted to do something way beyond me giving a message, I just didn’t know if I had the courage to…ask.
I had this number that just wouldn’t leave my mind. And I really thought I was crazy.
But I’d been hanging around one of my crazy-believing-God-for-everything friends lately and she challenged me to break the bonds of safe-praying I held.
So, I whispered in my soul, “Lord, I believe you are bringing 10 people to this event that need to accept you as their Savior. So God, if I’m not crazy, and my outrageous-believing-friend is right, will you bring these people tonight?”
My plane landed and I felt that prompting again… "Ask God.”
So I prayed this same prayer all over this quaint town. And I believed God, for the first time in a very long, dry season.
That night as I spoke, I stood nervously before these women whose eyes were filled with the sensation of God. I told them I believed God was about to do crazy-audacious things in our time that night. They smiled, nodded their heads and believed with me.
And wouldn’t you know…
Together we saw over 10 women raise their hands to say, “I want a new life in Jesus.”
One of the most powerful things I’d ever experienced.
So, my friend, perhaps you read these words today in a very dry, lonely dark season of life. Maybe you have believed God. Possibly you have trusted God.
And you have felt so much disappointment.
Could I be that girl, having no right to be in your business, encouraging you just to…ask God?
One more time. Crazy ask. Go for it. I’ll believe it with you today.
“Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.” –Ephesians 6:18