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It's Not About Sex

  • by Joan Brasher Copyright Christianity Today International
  • 2004 23 Apr
It's Not About Sex
Julianne Moore says she's much like Audrey, the character she plays in Laws of Attraction, which opens in theaters Friday, April 30. Like Audrey, Moore, 43, was once so driven and career-focused that it led to the demise of her first marriage. Now happily remarried and the mother of two, Moore says that she, like Audrey, has learned to focus on the stuff of life that really matters—love and family.How do you relate to Audrey, the character you play in this film?Audrey is familiar to me in many ways. She was focused on her career. She wanted to be at the top of her field, and she worked very hard at it. And in doing that, she kind of neglected her personal life. A lot of women feel like we work very hard at our jobs, but in our personal life, that's something that happens to you; you don't take responsibility for that. You get to a certain point where things don't happen in your personal life and you say, "Well, a great guy never came along, but I've worked very hard and I'm successful." Experience has taught Audrey that everything doesn't work out.In this movie, the marriage was the start of the love affair.Yeah, very much so. You can't really know somebody until you promise to be there and be present and to work through stuff. You only get somewhere by going beyond that. And I think that's good to hear in a movie. She's waiting for her personal life to happen, but you have to choose it and want it and work at it. If something goes wrong, that doesn't mean it's the end. It's only the beginning of something. It's saying, "I'm going to be here, and I want you to be here too." I thought that was very positive and very truthful.What did you draw from your own personal experience to play this character? Did you relate to any of her quirks, like the binge eating?I am a candy fanatic! M&Ms. I have a candy problem. Wanna know something sick? I was doing this movie in New York and it was right after Christmas and I had eaten all this stuff over Christmas and I knew I had to finish this movie and get ready for the Oscars and I had three photo shoots and re-shoots every weekend. I had no time to go to the gym. So I had no recourse. I had to give up the candy. And guess what? I lost weight. So that was humiliating. How much am I eating? It was a lot!How would you describe Daniel's love for Audrey?What's great about it is that through all of her neurotic eccentricities, he sees her. He sees that she is a person who cares about people and believes in something. And I think that's what they share. They're not as different as you think they are.It's a romantic comedy, sexually motivated and yet there's no nudity. Why such a "clean" approach when so many of today's films take it further?It wasn't in the script, so it was never an issue. In all the old ones, you never saw anybody in bed together. You saw them kiss and then there was a fadeout. I like that; you don't know whether they slept together. [Sex] isn't what this film is about. It's about people who are falling in love and starting their relationship. Yes, it's for grown-ups. I can appreciate a romantic comedy that involves young people, but when I'm watching them, I'm thinking, What are they worried about? They're 18. They shouldn't get together. They should go to separate colleges and that's fine. But when you're talking about people in their 30s and 40s, you think, OK, get married. I think it's important to have both work and love in your life.What causes Audrey's rampant insecurity?Well, where's her dad? She grew up with a single mom who is dating all the time. She feels professionally competent, but she doesn't feel personally competent. None of us is completely confident. As a child of a single parent, it is hard to be confident.What do you see shaping people's values today?I think there is a return to marriage as a choice. In my parents' day, you got married. That was it. There wasn't any decision about it. Then people were figuring out who they are first, then a career, and marriage. Now people are saying, "I want to have a balanced life." Marriage is about being willing to be committed to a person and to my children. I just got married. But I wanted to make sure it was what I wanted. I want to be married; I want my children. We're a family unit. That is good. And it's not a cultural expectation, it's a choice.How important is humor in a relationship?It's enormous. Life is so short. With every day that goes by, I always feel like I'm hurtling toward death! You should have an appreciation for the people in your life and every joyful moment. It's the best thing in the world to make someone laugh. I want them to feel something. I like to make them cry and I like to make them laugh. That's why we go to the movies. We go to experience something.

Look for Julianne Moore next in The Forgotten, a "psychological thriller" due this fall.

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