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Discover the Book - Feb. 13, 2010

  • 2010 Feb 13

Husbands Who Love Like Jesus


As we open to Ephesians 5, think about the end of Creation Week, as God looked over the entire scope of the Universe He fashioned, only one element was "not good". It was man. Adam was alone, and God said that wasn't good. So God crowned the six stellar days of creation with Eve, the perfect partner and friend for Adam. When God designed marriage, it was to perfectly complete those He had fashioned in His image. God established a vital truth: a designer marriage would be one lived the way God designed it to be. Sadly, most marriages are not designer marriages.

Today if you are married, or ever want to be—it would be wise to seek out having a marriage as God the Designer wants it to be. In modern society families are drawn to buying "designer" clothes, or living in "designer" homes. That means clothes or houses that were specifically designed by a master at the art of clothing or home comforts. Usually, designer property and clothes are better made, more beautiful, and much different that run of the mill, average things. But often those same people who prefer everything else to be top of the line, neglect to see that at the deepest level of their life, home and family they are missing the best "designed" element—a designer marriage

Do you have a Designer Marriage?


The focus of God's plan and design for marriage is simple; and the description is short. God says that a designer marriage starts with a man who will love and lead His wife in the same way Christ loves His Church. Please open there with me to Ephesians 5:25-33, as we listen to God, the Designer of Marriage, share that design planned by Him, to make every marriage good.


"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 31 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."


If you are carefully following the instructions in the Scriptures, here is what God designed your marriage to be. We can each check these Scriptural portraits to see how we're doing in our marriage:

  • A God-designed marriage is one we enjoy so much that for the past 4,000 years godly men get so deeply in love with the wife God blessed them to have, they can't hide their complete attraction to their wife—just like Isaac and Rebekah got caught "sporting" (Genesis 26:8, KJV).
  • A God-designed marriage is such a wonderful gift that, like Jacob, waiting for your bride seven years, even at the cost of hard labor, would seem but a moment (Genesis 29:20).
  • A God-designed marriage is like a joyful river of intoxicating blessings(Proverbs 5:18-19); that becomes like a fruitful vine delightfully growing around two covenant-joined lives (Psalm 128:3).
  • A God-designed marriage is an endless subscription to regularly delivered packages of goodness and favor from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22).
  • A God-designed marriage gives the complete security of a trusted companion—with whom we share a God honoring, not to be broken, life-long covenant (Malachi 2:14-15)


Husbands, if I were to confidentially ask your wife would she know that Christ is the One whose love you seek to model? Does your wife know that you are striving to be more like Christ in your relationship with her? Would she understand that the pattern of God's Word is where you seek to head your marriage? 

You will never get to your destination or goal unless you have a plan for getting there. All unattended marriages begin to slowly decline in closeness, intimacy, fruitfulness, and blessing. Therefore, it is a good idea to periodically have a refresher course in what the Lord has to say about our God-designed responsibilities as husbands.

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