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The Authentic Nobody

Nicki Koziarz

 

The issue: Who do we really want to be?

A few months ago I was at an event speaking and I had several women come up to me and say, “I have never heard of you!” While my initial reaction could have been, “Gee, thanks,” I actually breathed a sigh of relief and my heart whispered, “Good.”

I have changed… so much.

I often find myself glancing in the mirror wondering, “Who is this girl?”

This is not a bad change, my friend, but it’s been a painful change. One that has required a lot of soul-searching and a realization of who I am and more importantly who I am not.

There’s a revelation coming to full-circle in my soul, one that I’m not willing to compromise for anything anymore:

I’d rather be an authentic nobody than a cheap knock-off of a somebody.

Perhaps, for the first time in my life, I’m beginning to understand who God has created me to be.

Lost.

I’ve felt that way for months. Wandering towards a Savior but on such a misleading path. And today I am so grateful that Truth has grabbed me, shaken me and not allowed me to not remain the same. I am incredibly grateful I hardly recognize that girl in the mirror anymore.

I pray I never discount this ever-evolving realization again.

“So if you’re serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don’t shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you.” – Colossians 3:1 [MSG]

While it may not always seem so, there is a constant direction on this path of life. Colossians 3:1 describes this direction with specific instructions:

-I do want to be serious about this defining place.

-I do want to pursue the things of Jesus.

-And I do not want my eyes to be so focused on me that I cannot see what God is doing.

I want to be an authentic nobody because it fully allows Jesus to be the only somebody in me.

I think this means I can finally embrace the dreams, plans and visions God has given me. Because when we aren’t willing to compromise who we are anymore, we finally have the ability to stay true to who God has designed us to be.

Perhaps you have already discovered this. These words aren’t anything new, fresh or unheard of. But maybe today there is just one other person struggling through this same journey. As I process this, I invite you to join me.

Who do we really want to be?