A Message for Singles This Valentine's Day...

When the month of February arrives, so many singles are just about emotionally worn out after the three previous holidays. Family and friends continue asking, “So is there anyone new in your life?” There never ceases to be an extra chair next to you at the dinner table. Or maybe you went to another winter wedding and did your walk to the center of the dance floor during the bouquet toss as an added reminder that you are not married.

Valentine’s Day can be really challenging for singles. Whether you have never been in a dating relationship, never been married, are divorced, or widowed; here is a message for you this Valentine’s Day.

1. You Are Loved by God

1 John 4:16 “And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.”

The simple fact is that God is the definition of love. He lives out His character by loving us. A relationship status does not determine your worth this day, or any day for that matter. When you wake up in the morning, remind yourself that you are loved by God, the One who is better than any person on this earth. He loves fuller and more that anyone ever could.

In this place of resting in His love, we find our confidence. Whether single or not, everyone has to make a choice whether to idolize others or put Christ first in their lives. His love is perfect love. Celebrate that this Valentine’s Day and every day.

2. You Are Loved by Family and Friends

1 John 4:7 “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.”

Not only do we have the love of God, but we have the love of family and friends. This is such a sweet gift that often gets overlooked. During a holiday that celebrates love, we often box ourselves in to solely romantic love, however there are many different forms of love in the world. When we think about our family members, think of who we could bless in unique ways such as service, flowers, or cards. Their love is still something worth celebrating.

We might have a great group of friends and want to acknowledge our gratitude for their love and support. I know in college, I would host Galantines Day every year and it was an absolute blast! Instead of moping in my dorm room or apartment, I enjoyed the wonderful relationships that the Lord did provide in my life. This did not negate the desire to have a boyfriend or husband, but instead of focusing on what I did not have, I practiced celebrating what I did have in life. We would have an amazing dinner, play games, and watch a chick flick! It was the best! Although I am married now, I still love celebrating my single friends around Valentine’s Day because love is more than just romantic love.

3. You Are Called to Love Others

Romans 12:9-10 - “Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection and take delight in honoring each other.”

As believers in Christ, we are called to love others. This whole holiday dedicated to love can be full of heartache, rejection, and loneliness to some. However, as Christ-followers, we are called to share the love that Jesus has for people. This is an opportune moment to look outside of our own personal desires and see the needs of others.

Whether you write valentines cards to the elderly, throw a valentines party for people who might not have plans, or recognize those who have lost loved ones in sweet ways, get creative and keep your eyes open.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Shutter2U

4. You Are Called to Confidence

Jeremiah 17:7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him.”

If we never looked around at other people’s lives, but focused on Christ and His call for our own lives, we would be so much more joyful. Comparison is just one tool the enemy uses to distract us from what God is doing in our lives. The Lord has a purpose for us. We are here in this season, in this moment, for a reason. If we get swept up, like many of us – myself included – then we miss the moment. God has called us to confidence in Him, He knows us and our desires, He holds our tears in a bottle, He empathizes with our disappointments. But ultimately, He is sovereign and His ways are higher and better. We have to trust Him.

There is an abundance of freedom and peace when we are confident in who we are in Christ and His purpose for this season of our lives. No matter what season of life, people are always looking ahead and wanting what is next. What if we just slowed down and thanked God for all that is in our lives today? We would be much more joyful and peace-filled individuals, living on purpose in Jesus’ name.

5. You Have Meaning and a Purpose

Whether you are celebrating this holiday or not, I know the frustration and the exhaustion of seeing posts and ads about romantic love. You are worth so much more than a relationship status or a ring. You were bought with a price by Jesus’ blood, you were given so many forms of love through friendship and family, and you are invited to love others who are overlooked and need encouragement.

Instead of this Valentine’s Day being a day that you want to skip or fast forward through, let it be a day that motivates you to look outside of yourself and love others. They can see Jesus’ love through your words and actions. People are most open to hear the gospel during crisis and change. For some people, Valentine’s Day is a small crisis. Ask God to use this time to share His perfect love with others.

Remember, you are loved by God, loved by family and friends, you are called to love others, and you have a meaning and a purpose for this season.

Emma Danzey’s mission in life stems from Ephesians 3:20-21, to embrace the extraordinary. One of her greatest joys is to journey with the Lord in His Scriptures. She is wife to Drew and mom to Graham. Emma serves alongside her husband in ministry, she focuses most of her time in the home, but loves to provide articles on the Bible, life questions, and Christian lifestyle. Her article on Interracial Marriage was the number 1 on Crosswalk in 2021. Most recently, Emma released Treasures for Tots, (Scripture memory songs) for young children. During her ministry career, Emma has released Wildflower: Blooming Through Singleness, two worship EP albums, founded and led Polished Conference Ministries, and ran the Refined Magazine. You can view her articles on her blog at emmadanzey.wordpress.com and check out her Instagram @Emmadanzey.