As of this precise moment, 99 people have joined my Facebook Fan Page---99 people who've been willing to step forward, and boldly proclaim to all who for some reason happen to see that page that yes---yes!---they have no particular reason not to claim that they're not especially repelled by my writing.
♥ 99 fans of my blog on my page; 99 fans of my blog; you take one down, pass him around; he wakes up and pounds you right into a fog. ♥
So, the point is: If you act now, and become my 100th Facebook Fan, I will send you a free book, inscribed with "Thanks for being my 100th Facebook Fan!" and autographed by none other than my next door neighbor, Brian, who is an actual Hollywood stunt car driver! If come the time, however, Brian is off wearing sunglasses while expressionlessly parking cars at warp speed, I will sign the book myself.
Now, you can't join my Facebook page if never read my stuff, since that would be almost as sad as me actually bribing people to get fans. But if you've been meaning to sign up as a Facebook fan o' moi (just as, honestly, I've been trying to think of something bloggily fun to do with one or two of my books), here's your chance to do right by me and snag a free book autographed by the less famous of the two authors named on its cover!
Act now! Click here! Postage is on me! I excel at stampage!