These remarks warm our hearts, knowing that there are couples who have not only made it through marriage, but have developed healthy, vibrant ones. These couples are true mentors and role models for us all.

So how do we get to where they are? The very survival of your marriage depends on recognizing the scope of the promise made on your wedding day. Renewing love says with absolute conviction, “Divorce is not an option. We’re married for life.” Barb and I have made a commitment to never use the word “divorce” in our marriage and we challenge you to do the same. On your wedding day, God glued your and your mate’s hearts together in a covenant to each other and to Him. The first step in making your marriage a divorce-proofed marriage is to commit to never walking away. Barb and I are serious about this. If you’re not perpetually experiencing renewing love, your marriage is in danger of heading in the wrong direction.

Where you are in your marriage is important, but where you’re headed is even more crucial. So what will you do to build a divorce-proofed marriage? Knowing that divorce-proofing is a lifelong process, we have one word of advice: Start with renewing love. It will set all the other loves in motion. You need the divorce-proofing elements of forgiving love, serving love, persevering love, guarding love and celebrating love to make your marriage last a lifetime. But without a deep commitment to experience – and keep experiencing – these various expressions of renewing love, you’ll lack the confidence that your marriage can survive the pressures of the twenty-first century culture.

Love may be a choice, but it’s more than a decision of the heart and mind. You must commit your full energy to nurture, feed and care for your spouse and your marriage, just like the rose bush. God’s design is that the person with whom you shared wedding cake will be the love of your life. Your commitment to that person must be renewed with each passing day so that your love will grow and deepen to a level of intimacy beyond your wildest dreams. This is no fantasy. It is a living reality for those who come to understand the meaning of love, and who commit to love in this way. Barb and I desire to strive for that reality in our marriage – won’t you join us in working towards that goal?

Portions of this article were adapted from "Divorce-Proof Your Marriage," © 2002 by Dr. Gary and Barbara Rosberg, all rights reserved. Published by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., www.tyndale.com. To order this resource or to find our more about America’s Family Coaches, visit www.afclive.com or call 1-888-ROSBERG. For more information about the Divorce-Proofing America’s Marriages campaign logon to www.divorceproof.com.

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