“This Can’t Be . . .”
"Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6 AMP
Thoughts for Today
When a family learns that a loved one is trapped in a life-controlling problem, letting go can be difficult. And yet letting go is one of the most important things we can do.
When a person is struggling with a life-controlling problem, everyone around that individual is affected. Family members often grieve the emotional loss of their loved one and usually go through emotional stages much like those of a dying person learning to accept his death. Researchers have found these five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Consider this …
If someone you care about is struggling with a life-controlling problem, being aware of these five stages can help you understand what you have been feeling and see that your feelings are normal.
Often the first stage is denial. In this stage we protect ourselves from the shock of learning about our loved one's condition by refusing to accept it. We are trying to protect ourselves from the reality. "This can't be" is our natural first reaction. When we are in this stage, we need to overcome the denial that is distorting our thinking so that we can look clearly at what is really happening.
We need to ask God to help us let go of the fear and shock. We can't ever reach the point of helping our loved one if we refuse to face the truth. We need to let go … and let God.
Lord, I really don't want to admit that my loved one has this life-controlling problem, but deep down I know it's true. I also know I can't deal with this on my own. Teach me not to rely on my own understanding, but to lean on you for guidance and strength. Help me take this first big step of admitting the truth. In Jesus' name …
These thoughts were drawn from …
Concerned Persons: Because We Need Each Other by Jimmy Ray Lee, D.Min. This study is designed for the many people who have a current or past relationship with a person who has a life-controlling problem. Note: This curriculum was written especially for small groups, and we encourage people to use it that way. However, it can also be used effectively as a personal study for individuals or couples.
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