Perfect Wife Wannabes Can Relax
- Friday, April 04, 2003
Women are often plagued by a stubborn desire for control - in their marriages, and other aspects of their lives, writes Camp. That urge to control "is the very foundation of the curse God placed on Eve and one that is not easily overcome," she says. "I can quickly take charge of every situation in our home. I'm not advocating that women sit back and do nothing in their homes, but often we are usurping our husband's authority simply because we don't think he'll do something that we think is important or that he'll make a decision we don't like."
If wives pursue patience and discipline themselves not to forge ahead before their husbands, Camp says, they can discover how to work out better and more peaceful solutions.
When God says no to a request or asks people to wait, He has a good reason for doing so, says Camp. "I think a lot of times we get confused between God being faithful, and God granting our every wish. What I have found in my own life is when God was not answering my prayers as quickly as I was hoping, He was actually working a far greater thing in me than if He had simply granted my requests."
Camp also emphasizes how important it is for wives to help their husbands however they can. She encourages wives who feel they're shouldering too much of the burden for household chores to seek positive solutions rather than harboring resentment. "For one thing, open communication is vital," says Camp. "Often, though, a man is demanding because he's not getting some basic needs met in his life. When I feel that Steve is being demanding of my time and attentions, I will often discover that I have been more distant, busy, or unavailable for him. I also find it a good idea to research about personality types, love languages, etc. Some of those tools when put in the hands of a loving wife will reap marvelous rewards for both the husband and wife. If we put forth the effort to truly help our husbands, we will see rewards beyond what we could have even imagined."
If wives can work on accepting the gifts of grace and unconditional love that God offers them, they'll discover something even better than the world's image of perfection, Camp says. "I used to think that one day I would arrive at a point that I would not have many struggles. Now, I see that as the lie from Satan that it was. I no longer long to be perfect. I am now looking forward to the future as a place of greater love and joy and fellowship with the Holy Spirit. The future looks even brighter than ever when I see that there is no limit to the love that I can feel or exhibit."
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