She went on to state, “He installed spyware on my personal laptop and tracked every website I visited for the entire eight years of our marriage without my knowledge, and used that information to verbally attack and criticize me.”

Another person said of her former spouse, “He used religion to try to control me.”

In similar vein, another wrote about her former spouse, “His control began primarily through religion and gradually grew to a complete totalitarian system including dress code, language, schedule, even private prayers.”

My Spouse Uses Anger

One spouse said of her current husband, “He gets angry if I make a mistake.”

Another said her mate controls her through yelling at her.

Writing about her former husband, one person stated, “He would give me the silent treatment for days at a time when he got mad at me. He was verbally abusive and lectured me like a little child.”

A young wife said of her current spouse, “He had (and is still working on) anger issues and I quickly became afraid of his outbursts, though he never hit or hurt me physically.”

My Spouse Uses Criticism and Sarcasm

A respondent wrote of her current husband, “He is constantly sarcastic towards me.”

A woman said of her former husband, “He was very verbally critical and found a way to twist anything I valued into a weapon to control me. He tried to make me feel that I was bad or wrong or undeserving.”

My Spouse Acts Superior to Me 

One person responded about her current husband, “He expects me to do things and think the way he does. He believes his way is better.”

Another wrote of her current husband, “The verbal abuse comes in the form of questioning everything I do or say. Any opinion I have or knowledge I have of a subject is dismissed as stupid or incorrect. I can tell him what happened at a concert and he will look me right in the eye and tell me it didn't happen in that way. He comes across as the ultimate know-it-all and the rest of the world is inferior to him, yet I know his own self-esteem is in the toilet or he wouldn't feel the need to act this way. I can be cooking in the kitchen and he will come in and take over because his way is better. I can get ready to draw something, such as a triangle, and he will try to take the pencil out of my hand and draw it for me because he doesn't feel that I can do it. He comes across very charming and affable to the outside world, but at home he is totally different. All of our friends would be shocked if they really knew what he was like.”

My Spouse Controls the Money

Referring to her former husband, a respondent stated, “He controlled all money including my paycheck. He gave me an allowance of $100 per week for anything I or my daughter needed.”

About her former spouse, one woman wrote, “He spent money with no regard to our ability to earn money, including running up a home equity loan.”

Another said of her former husband, “He made it clear that HE made all the money and was angry if I spent any (he made more than $700,000 per year). To stop his accusations about my spending, I would cut coupons, shop sales, etc., and then write the check for the full amount. I kept the savings as 'cookie jar' money so I could buy him a Christmas or birthday present without him seeing the credit card bill. When he discovered what I did, he blew up and said I was stealing from him.”

She continued, “I caught him having an affair. I got a nice settlement.”

My Spouse Tried to Control or Dominate Me By Embarrassing Me

Writing about her former husband, a respondent said, “Drinking made him mean, usually only to me. He drank a lot and I had to create diversions to get him home before he launched into me and eliminated any chance of a social life.”