If you are single - or married to an unbeliever - you may find yourself wondering if you'll ever be "spiritually one" with someone this side of heaven. If you are married to a man who just isn't as fired up about his spiritual life as you are, you too may be asking this question. In either case, I want to encourage you that there is a certain "aloneness" that comes with your relationship with Christ that is precious and produces much blessing. So, rather than fight for what you feel is lacking in your life, here are some reasons to embrace the aloneness you may be experiencing: 

1. Our Alone Times Deepen our Relationship with God - While we all need encouragement, support, accountability, and regular fellowship with other believers, our true spiritual condition comes down to our individual time alone with God. Rather than resenting that you feel alone in your spiritual quest if there isn't a man alongside you, capitalize on it by taking the opportunity - when the sadness strikes - to bring it to God and relish in His presence with you.

2. Our Alone Times Drive us to a More Intense Prayer Life -- I looked around at the prayer warriors in my church one Sunday and realized they all had one thing in common. They were all women who were alone, spiritually. Each of them was either married to an unbeliever, attended church by themselves or was single or divorced. Did their alone times cause them to develop a more intimate relationship with God? Did they learn, through not having a man at their side, to go to God more intensely and more often? Had they needed to rely on prayer for their provision and protection more so than women who tend to rely on their husbands for the same?  When we have no one else in our lives to turn to, we turn to God, don't we? I truly believe our alone times can intensify our prayer life.

3. Our Alone Times Remind Us to Invest in Others - While you may lack spiritual encouragement from a spouse, you can be that encouraging person in another woman's life. When I complained to God years ago about not having any spiritual mentors in my life, He impressed upon my heart to start being a mentor in someone else's life. As I was faithful to do so, He brought the encouragement and support I needed in due time.

Alone is a word we, as women, don't tend to like. But as we grow in our relationship with God, perhaps it is something we will desire more and more, so we can be alone with Him.

April 6, 2010

Cindi McMenamin is a national speaker and the author of several books, including When Women Walk Alone, Letting God Meet Your Emotional Needs, and Women On the Edge. For more on her books or ministry, see www.StrengthForTheSoul.com