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Irritable Men, Frustrated Women

"I'm not angry," Jed said emphatically to his wife, Jill as we all sat in my office, They had flown across the country a few days earlier to work with me on their marriage.

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • December 14, 2010 |
  • comments
Pathway to Relational Healing

It was a scene I had witnessed over and over before during my professional career. Couples trying to make contact with each other, only to have their conversation escalate, gain tension and blow apart, leaving both feeling profoundly discouraged.

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • November 23, 2010 |
  • comments
He Just Doesn’t Get Me!

"I'm so discouraged," Jill told to me during a recent Marriage Intensive. "Look at him," she said critically. "He doesn't even look at me when I'm talking..."

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • November 16, 2010 |
  • comments
Critical Spirit Just as Destructive to Marriage as "Bigger" Problems

Dear Dr. David: It seems that whenever my husband comes home from work, he slips into being critical. How can I get him to see that this kind of bickering is killing my love for him?

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • November 14, 2010 |
  • comments
Should a Spouse's Physical Appearance Matter?

Should we, as husbands or wives, be concerned about how our mate looks, or should our love be unconditional? Here are some of your responses...

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • November 08, 2010 |
  • comments
Is Deception Ever Acceptable in Marriage?

While I have stated that deception always creates insecurity in marriage, and suggests even deeper problems, several readers indicated that there are times when the ends justify the means...

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • November 01, 2010 |
  • comments
Help! We Love the Lord, But We're Cruel to Each Other

Dear Dr. David: I am beyond frustrated with my marriage and husband. We have been married for ten years and have never been able to stop bickering...

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • October 26, 2010 |
  • comments
Overcome Intimacy Paralysis

"When I try to get emotionally close to him, he panics," Sharon said to me during a recent marriage counseling session. "It's like he's a scared little boy, unsure of what to do..."

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • October 18, 2010 |
  • comments
I'm So Angry, I Can't Hear You!

"I know I'm not being very nice to him," Janice said to me, glaring over at her husband during a counseling session. "I'm always so mad at him there just isn't any room in my brain for being nice. I'm filled up with anger."

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • October 12, 2010 |
  • comments
Happy Feet: Bringing Joy to Your Marriage

Many couples slip into boring, mundane existences and the toll can take its effect. Years of raising a family, working and caring for a home—without the excitement of vacations, little surprises and special events to look forward to—can create a drain on a marriage.

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • October 04, 2010 |
  • comments
Reset, Reboot, and Rewind Your Relationship

My computer froze the other day. With several programs running simultaneously, it was like my computer suddenly said, "Stop everything. I'm not doing anything more..."

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • September 28, 2010 |
  • comments
The Unmanageable Boss

You are expected to be a good employee, to show up for work on time every morning, to follow orders, to be mannerly and show deference to authority. But what do you do when you have a boss who won't show the same respect to you?

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • September 13, 2010 |
  • comments
How to Stop Enabling Your Young Adult

Many parents continue to support their adult children, and in some cases even participate in raising their grandchildren. For things to change, everyone must breakdown.

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • September 07, 2010 |
  • comments
Are You an Impulsive Spouse?

Dear Dr. David: My wife has such a short fuse that it scares me...

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • August 31, 2010 |
  • comments
Neutralizing Arguments with Your Spouse

What if there is a way to engage in lively conversation without bickering or arguing? What if you could disagree with your mate and still not argue? Would you be interested?

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • August 23, 2010 |
  • comments
Married to a Narcissist

What can you do if you find yourself in close relationship with someone with narcissistic tendencies?

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • August 17, 2010 |
  • comments
Hurting People Hurt People

We seem wired to find fault and cast blame, minimizing our own faults while maximizing the faults of our mate. While there are certainly situations where one mate has perpetrated abuse on the other, many marriages are fraught with mutual wounding.

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • August 09, 2010 |
  • comments
Attack the Problem, Not the Person

Stubborn individualism is, in my opinion, at the root of many marital problems. Rather than attacking their problems, facing issues as a team, spouses attack each other...

  • Dr. David Hawkins |
  • August 02, 2010 |
  • comments
Pray to God... and Row to Shore

We've all been in a place where we want to trust God to change a situation, whether it is a troubled marriage, a difficult job, an addicted spouse, or perhaps a habit that destroys our self-worth. But “just praying” is often the wrong approach.

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • July 20, 2010 |
  • comments
Perfectionism: A Marriage Killer

The perfectionist often expects more from others than they expect from themselves. At the very least perfectionists see faults in another, amplifies them, while minimizing their own weaknesses. This combination is lethal to a marriage.

  • Dr. David B. Hawkins |
  • July 13, 2010 |
  • comments
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Example: "Gen 1:1" "John 3" "Moses" "trust"
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