• Talk with your husband -- explain how overwhelmed you are. He might not understand, but you'll feel better. He could help with the children and he might even be encouraged to put his dirty laundry in the hamper and not next to it -- but don't hold your breath.

• Have a family meeting -- Let everyone know what results you expect from them. Promise rewards for obedience and serious consequences for disobedience. Then follow through with both.

• Delegate according to ability not according to gender --"Dishes are a girl's job." Jeremy once complained.

"Not at this house." I reminded him. "Because of that remark, you can be on dish duty all week."

You'll do your son's future wife a favor if you teach him to keep house. It won't make him a sissy; it will make him a "real man."

• Don't do anything for your kids they can do themselves. Someone told me this when my kids were very young, and I was thrilled when my children reached each milestone: dressing themselves, cleaning up after themselves, feeding themselves, and doing their own laundry. I instructed them and stood back so they could become self-sufficient. While visiting one day, my mother started to fix my 3-year-old's feeble attempt at bed making. "Don't Mom, it's fine. She'll get better." I told her. Now that she's 21, Ashley makes a bed an Army sergeant would be proud of.

Just remember, as far as chores are concerned, our job as a mother is to teach ourselves out of a job.


My favorite Chore Chart for younger kids: Choreganizers By: Jennifer Steward


Tonya Ruiz is a popular conference speaker. She is also a pastor's wife, homeschooling mom, and grandmother who calls Southern California home. To find out more: www.TonyaRuiz.com.