Have you ever found decision-making difficult since you became a single mom? You're not alone. Without the husband we hoped would always be there, the burden of making important decisions alone can at times be crushing. As if to add insult to injury, single mothers frequently face many difficult personal issues such as feeling overwhelmed, depressed, shocked, and lonely. Operating with a clear, focused mind can prove quite difficult. We need someone to turn to for help, guidance and assistance.

The widowed woman in 2 Kings 4 was in a horrible state. Her creditors were threatening to take her sons away as payment for her debts. Can you imagine having to sell your children to slavery to repay debts? What did she do? How did she handle this situation?

She sought after Elisha and she shared her problem with him. Elisha, a very wise man, gave her instructions on how to handle the situation. As it turns out, he gave very valuable advice. With her faith, obedience and hard work, she was able to not only pay off her debts, but was well taken care of financially for the rest of her life.

As modern single moms, we too have to seek after wise counsel to help us with the problems we face. Most of us, though, struggle with fear over seeking outside counsel or feel embarrassed at the thought of not being able to handle things on our own. That is a lie from the enemy to keep you down and out. If the Bible says to get wise counsel, then we need to do it.

Wise counsel is not only for facing problems. It is an accountability process. We can lean on other people in the body of Christ to hold us up in every area of our lives. It is wise to have other people to "check in with" on a daily or weekly basis to make sure that we are on track with all that we have to do and take care of.

God does not want us to be alone, and He does not want us to face all of our burdens alone. The Bible says in Galatians 6:2, "Carry each others burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Perhaps you are thinking right now that you don't have anyone that you know of that will help you. When God laid it on my heart to seek out mentors, I felt the same way. So I did the only thing I knew -- I prayed, asking the Lord to reveal to me who He had in mind. The Lord answered, and I have to tell you, I was not sure if I heard the Lord correctly. He impressed on my mind a couple that I barely knew in my church. I knew they were godly people, but I felt very strange asking them about something as personal as this.

Yet, all I could do was respond to God's answer in obedience and ask them to consider fulfilling a mentorship role in my life. It turns out they were not only delighted, but honored that the Lord chose them for this. You see, because they are wise, they knew the value behind this principle. They knew it was biblical, and that by answering God's call they would play an important role in providing a spiritual covering, safety and security for my son and me.

I would like to encourage you to make the choice today to have someone be your wise counsel and accountability partner. Ask the Lord who He has chosen for this task, and then have the courage to do what the wise widow did -- seek them out. When you find the right mentors, don't be afraid of burdening them because in the long run, God will bless all of you.


Lori Little, A Woman By Design ministry's founder, is the former Director of John C. Maxwell's THRiVE!, Becoming A Woman Of Influence. A major focus of Lori's ministry is the Hope and Help for the Single Mom initiative. Watch for Lori's book Hope and Help for the Single Mom, by Waterbrook Press, in 2005.


21 Principles of a Healthy Single Mom offers meaningful messages, helpful advice and loving encouragement for every single mom. To inquire about and order the CD packages, call 1-888-430-HOPE, or visit the website at: www.hope4singlemoms.com.

Dr. Charles Stanley says of the 21 Principles:

"If a single mom will follow these 21 Principles, there is no way for her to fail. She will watch herself grow in her own strength and abilities and become more confident as the leader of her home.

The 21 Principles of a Healthy Single Mom is a practical asset for single mothers to apply specific, workable, successful guidelines to her life."