How to Attract the Right Mate
- Thursday, September 11, 2008
When it’s springtime, that means it’s mating season for many birds in our neighborhood. I’ve seen bird couples who’ve found their mates and more prominently, I’ve heard the calls of birds who haven’t yet found their mates.
The most noticeable mating call I hear is that of a quail. When quail call to find mates, they find the highest possible point. They park themselves there, and they call out loudly in some sort of pattern every minute or two; they are quite persistent and very noticeable. Even though their calls can be heard for quite some distance, they only attract others of their kind because other quail recognize the calls.
This got me to thinking about the “mating calls” many single Christians give out when trying to attract their mates. Now obviously people don’t literally perch themselves on a high point and “call” out to find mates, but each person does have a unique mating call that will determine what kind of person he/she will attract.
People in the world attract the people they do by default or they try to change who they attract by trial and error. But God gives Christian singles specific guidance in His Word on how to be a person who attracts the right mate.
Finding Your Perch
Like I mentioned, the quail that I’ve observed like to perch on a high spot so they can be seen by potential mates. We can take guidance from that by paying attention to where we congregate and spend our time. A quail has more of a chance of finding a mate if he is up high where he can see more. A single Christian has more of a chance to find a godly mate if he/she hangs around church and other Christian events, rather than at bars or worldly parties. The environment you choose to be around says a lot about you as a person, and it will also say a lot about the others who are there as well.
The key here is that you want to be around church and godly people because you enjoy it. If your main reason to attend church is to attract a mate, then you are faking yourself out and will most likely fake others out, too. But if you enjoy serving at church and you meet someone else who does too, then you are more likely to be compatible right off the bat.
I’ve heard many single people say (and I’ve even said it too) “there are no good available men (or women) in my church.” But if you are serving at church because you enjoy it, then it doesn’t matter. When I was single, I served at church all the time because I loved it. Now that I’m married, my husband and I serve at church all the time together because it’s a passion that we share.
Staying in Your Spot
There is a relentless quail in my neighborhood that parks himself on my neighbors’ two story roof and will stay there and call for his mate for hours. It gets kind of annoying after a while, but I have to admire his persistence—he found his spot and he’s not moving.
If many single Christians would just find a spot and stay there, they might have more a chance of developing the kind of relationship that could deepen into love. Instead, I’ve seen so many young Christian singles hopping from church to church hoping that the right cute guy or girl is at this other church since they can’t find one where they already are. This leads to people being uprooted and having shallow roots wherever they go.
The Bible says that those who are planted in the house of the Lord shall flourish (Psalm 92:13). If you’re not planted and dedicated and committed to your church, then you won’t be able to flourish due to your shallow roots. God will bring your mate to you, you don’t have to go out and find him/her yourself.
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