I Love/Hate Being Single
- Thursday, April 19, 2012
Not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near (Hebrews 10:25).
For the body does not consist of one member but of many (1 Corinthians 12:14).
Candace, always single, 44 . . .
LOVE/LIKE: I love the freedom to be as I see fit. I love making new friends without limits, etc.
HATE/DISLIKE: I don't get to have sex. I don't have someone I can count on, someone I can learn and grow with.
I often tell friends the only thing I don't like about being single is the lack of physical intimacy. I really miss kissing, cuddling and sex. As a young adult I did not wait on God and chose to have sex. I would spend several years going from relationship to relationship, seeking something that only God could provide. Once I gave my life to Christ, I chose not to have sex again. I chose for God to fulfill all my needs, even the intimate ones. I know he made my body, and he knows how it works. I know he knows what I need and what I don't need. I choose to trust in him and his timing for all things. Are there some tough days? Of course. But as with most things, they pass, especially as I keep my eyes focused on him.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb (Psalms 139:13).
Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus (Philippians 3:13-14).
Joyce, divorced/widowed, single parent with grown kids, 69 . . .
LOVE/LIKE: I love that I do not have to always get up, put my makeup on, clean the house and have three meals put on the table every day. But that is also what I dislike. As much as doing all those things required daily discipline and in some ways being single allows me to not be in such a rush, this discipline helped keep me focused and on target. I seemed to get a lot more done.
HATE/DISLIKE: I miss the love of my life. I am thankful that the Lord has helped to fill this void.
Joyce has had to learn what singleness is all about. She was married her entire adult life. Singleness for her was a type of mystery. I know Joyce personally and can tell you that even though she desperately misses her husband who has passed, she is learning to be all that God wants her to be as a single. She isn't sure of the next steps but knows that her Savior will be there with her as she makes them.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me (Psalms 23:4).
Jack, always single, 34 . . .
LOVE/LIKE: I love the freedom to be able to do anything and ease of making decisions.
HATE/DISLIKE: I get lonely sometimes.
Although the Lord never got lonely, he was at times left alone, by those who didn't want to hear the gospel, by those who would hear the gospel but rejected it, and by his own disciples. He had the entire world on his shoulders to bear. So he knows firsthand what you are feeling as a single. However, being lonely is defined as "without hope." As a Christian, we have hope. So next time the enemy makes you feel like you are lonely, remember that more than likely you are feeling alone. Pray and ask God what this alone time is about. Is God trying to talk with you and you don't want to listen?
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