Keeping Romance on the Front Burner
- Neil Clark Warren eHarmony.com
- 2003 10 Oct
It's easy to forget to be romantic as you grow closer to someone, as you begin to forge a life together. It isn't because our feelings fade, but because other stresses and concerns can become overwhelming; yet it's important to keep it in mind. This is particularly true as you grow closer to someone, and your relationship becomes more certain, more solid, and heads toward a real commitment and marriage.
But it's important to keep in mind the benefits and the support romance and romantic feelings can create between you and your partner. It is the way we show our partner that they are special, that your relationship is unique. Continue to woo and celebrate each other, and take time to have fun together.
- Try to make a habit of sharing "couple time." This is a regular time when you share your inner thoughts and feelings with one another. This doesn't have to be a large amount of time. Even ten to fifteen minutes a day will help you stay in touch emotionally.
- Remember when talking to your partner that listening to them is as important as sharing your own feelings - let each other speak without interruption.
- If you spend a great deal of time away from each other, try to set aside time on a regular basis as often as you can to talk about how you are feeling and anything that has happened to you that you want to share with your partner.
- Write love letters to each other. Writing helps you to organize your thoughts clearly and to express them fully, but more than that, years later you'll have them as a wonderful record of your feelings for one another.
- If talking on the phone is not always possible (because of physical distance, phone charges, or scheduling problems), find creative ways to stay close that can ease the need for phone usage. Try using the internet. E-mail or instant messenger services are remarkably useful for staying in touch when using the phone isn't always possible.
- Make sure that you set aside time to talk only about the good things between you and in your lives, time to put aside the stresses of your life and simply be happy.
- Think of personal time and romance as relationship vitamins. They are good for your health and will help you stay positive and happy.
- Don't be afraid to pray for guidance. A close relationship with God is immeasurably helpful in all aspects of our lives, and this is no less true when trying to keep a relationship strong.
When we start a relationship with someone, we work especially hard to make that person happy. We go out of our way to be nice to them, to listen, to make them feel special. It's easy to forget that simply because it doesn't feel like work. The result is that we often forget this effort once things become "normal" between you and your partner. Bear this in mind, and remember that no matter how normal things become, keeping your relationship spontaneous and romantic strengthens your relationship and is worth every effort.
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