How far will you go to avert responsibility for your knowledge, actions and values in the face of shame, embarrassment, personal safety or negative public opinion? Will you stand up for your beliefs or admit your wrongdoings, or will you run, hide and blame others for your situation or transgressions?

I sometimes hear people say, “If it wasn’t for so and so, I would be married and happy” or “If such and such didn’t happen, I would be in a much better place” or “It’s not my fault because….” Okay, maybe there are some unique circumstances in your case where someone or something can be attributed to having had a negative impact on a portion of your life, but that is now history.

It’s time we stop blaming some past event or person on our actions or state of affairs and begin taking the necessary steps toward where we want to be and what God created us for. If we are ever going to make a difference in this world as believers, we need to take responsibility for ourselves now, no matter the consequence. 

Winston Churchill once said, “The price of greatness is responsibility.”

God blessed us with the power to make our own choices—the choice to receive him, to follow his Word, to love others, to forgive others, to forgive ourselves, to learn from mistakes, to live for a greater purpose, etc.

We can choose to accept responsibility for who we are, what we do and where we are going or continually make excuses for why we are not where we “say” we should be.

Especially as single adults, who are we to blame for what happens in our lives? Do we fault our parents, the “system,” our friends, our jobs or our locations? Or are we taking the necessary steps to grow, learn and live in a godly manner?

If we spend our whole life responding “I didn’t do it, it’s not me—it’s someone else,” it won’t be when an opportunity does present itself.

Each person must be responsible for himself (Galatians 6:5).


Cliff Young is a contributing writer to Sandlot Stories (ARose Books), as well as the monthly column, "He Said-She Said," in's Singles Channel.  An architect and former youth worker, he now works with Christian musicians and consults for a number of Christian ministries. Got feedback?  Send your comments and questions to