In many ways, the choice is yours. If you are married, then what I am about to share is the person you should strive to be. If you are young and at home, then what I am sharing from God's Word is what you should strive to become. And if you are grown, and starting out in life as a single person, this is what you should be and what you should look for in your marriage.
Again, marriage is the biggest decision next to salvation you will ever make. Be careful, be expecting a blessing, and be blessed with a wonderful joyous Biblical marriage.
Can I just share a short, personal testimony? Growing up in Michigan as a child was delightful. We lived by a lake and fished all summer, had fish fries with most of our neighbors, and enjoyed many fun moments as a family and at church. I even remember walking among sweet older ladies who were great neighbors and would give me cookies and hugs whenever I visited. That was my life at five years old.
As the years passed and my perception of the world around me grew, I began to notice the family next door was different. They could be heard at all hours screaming, banging, throwing things, and fighting. Then my parents explained that all that fighting meant that they were separating, and later they divorced. Soon I noticed while making a family tree for my class at Haslett School, that my dad’s mother, Grandma Barnett’s name had changed to Grandma Miller as she had divorced my grandfather and I got a new one – Grandpa Miller. My mom’s mother also stopped living with Grandpa, her husband, moved in with my uncle, and lived there never seeing her husband again until the day of her death. After that, and most devastating of all, I also began to notice my mother crying, my dad raising his voice and saw that there was tension inside our own home and family. Welcome to the America I grew up in -- the 1950’s!
What my family experienced is similar to some, vastly different than others. But, what I saw as the years passed, and as my exposure to God's Word grew caused me at a young age to want with all my heart one of those wonderful marriages the Bible seemed to offer. In fact, by my 10th birthday my parents had separated. My dad made a separate apartment for himself in the lower level of our home and only seemed to talk to my mom when they were angry. That sadness and tension and conflict drove me to the Psalms where many over the centuries have found comfort. My comfort became a prayer, “Lord, please let me have a home, a wife, and a family like Psalm 127 and 128 seems to promise.”