Many problems in relationships are thorny and difficult to resolve. Jealousy, it seems to me, is an easy one to eliminate. In my book, Nine Lifesavers for Every Couple I discuss the following guidelines that should be part of every relationship wanting to eliminate feelings of jealousy in their relationship.
1. Agree that there will be no close relationships with the opposite sex. While a close relationship with the opposite sex certainly doesn’t always lead to danger, a dangerous liaison often begins as a close friendship.
2. Agree that all relationships will be open to discussion. Dangerous friendships almost always contain an element of secrecy. Keep your friendships open to discussion and scrutiny.
3. Agree to always be sensitive to your mate’s feelings, placing them above anything else. Feelings must be accepted and honored. They should never be debated. Be sensitive to your mate’s feelings, no matter how uncomfortable they may be to you.
4. Agree not to scold or judge your mate for their feelings, however unrealistic they may seem to you. Create a safe place in your relationship for feelings to be expressed and protected. Everyone has a right to feel what they feel, and expect those feelings to be heard.
5. Agree to seek immediate solutions. Don’t let jealousy ruin your relationship. This is an easily solved problem—let your mate know their safety and honor is of utmost importance to you.
Are you struggling with jealousy in your relationship? Is your mate sensitive to your feelings? I’d like to hear from others who have overcome problems of jealousy in their relationship, and specifically how they have done it. Please share your concerns with me at TheRelationshipDoctor@Gmail.com.