Humility, coming from the word ‘humus’ or ‘earth, suggests giving up pretentions, self-righteousness and arrogance. But, letting go of arrogance doesn’t equate to embracing humility, where we take on the role of seeker and explorer. In this role we doubt ourselves, listening carefully to others, especially our mate, for what they have to say to us. We maintain an open attitude, considering what ‘kernel of truth’ our mate has for us in their message. “Defer to one another in love.” (Ephesians 5:21)

Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and Saying It So He'll Listen. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities.