With so many issues that can pull our hearts down, it is good to have a gate through which we can enter that can bring lightness to our hearts — that gate, through which we each can choose to enter, is thanksgiving. Consider the good aspects of your mate, the reasons you chose them in the beginning of your relationship. I suspect those traits are still there, perhaps hidden under some resentment or harsh feelings. Choose to remember those positive feelings. Reflect upon the positive aspects of your marriage and bring joy back into your heart. “Open for me the gates of righteousness; I will enter and give thanks to the Lord” (Psalms 118:1).

Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and Saying It So He'll Listen. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities.

Visit Crosswalk's Thanksgiving Facebook page at www.facebook.com/iAmThankful.