What would happen if you were to be "gently inquisitive" with your mate? What if you were to become a student of your mate, seeking to understand why they do what they do, like what they like, spend their free time the way they spend it? Most of us want others to "get us," and their attention is a genuine pleasure. Scripture says, “Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it.” (Proverbs 16:23) Be "gently inquisitive" with your mate and notice the positive results.

Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and Saying It So He'll Listen. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities.