Sometimes I find myself driving down the road mindlessly, only to be shocked into alertness by sudden brake lights, a siren or near-accident. How often do you find yourself coasting through your marriage, failing to pay close attention to the needs of your mate? Marriage takes constant alertness, not only for what your mate needs but also for what you need from your mate. Make a habit of keeping your eyes and ears open to what is needed in your marriage. “Set your mind on things above, not on early things.” (Colossians 3:2)

Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and Saying It So He'll Listen. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities.