Nobody is perfect. No one! Yet, studies show that we often forgive weaknesses in ourselves while holding others to a standard of perfection. This, of course, breeds discontent and contempt for others, eroding positive regard in our marriages and friendships. Instead of seeing the glaring weaknesses of others, look for the good. Notice their positive traits. Appreciate their foibles, idiosyncrasies and even their faults. Judge others the way you want to be judged—with compassion and kindness.


Dr. David Hawkins is the director of the Marriage Recover Center where he counsels couples in distress. He is the author of over 30 books, including Dealing With the CrazyMakers in Your Life90 Days to a Fantastic Marriage, and When Pleasing Others is Hurting You. Dr. Hawkins grew up in the beautiful Pacific Northwest and lives with his wife on the South Puget Sound where he enjoys sailing, biking, and skiing. He has active practices in two Washington cities. You can also find Dr. Hawkins on Facebook and Twitter