Yes! We have overlooked the response of God to the sin of Eve, “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you (Genesis 3:16b, ESV).” Women, we are to desire our husbands, but not his position of authority in our home.

Eve “was doomed as a wife and mother to suffer pain of body and distress of mind. From being the help meet of man and the partner of his affections [Genesis 2:18, 23], her condition would henceforth be that of humble subjection.[1]

Lessons on submission (Ephesians 5:22-24) were initially unnecessary because Adam and Eve’s nature was that of God and they would automatically do what was best for all concerned out of a heart of servant-leadership and love. This is the picture we see painted in fairy tales. However, post-fall we require God’s instruction to bend our wills to the point of submitting to His redeemed plan for marriage.

Our marriage is not a fairy tale to gain; rather, it is a paradise lost at the lips of God’s first created family. God redeemed fallen man (Romans 5:18-19) and now He desires our matrimony to mirror His Bride He purchased with the blood of Christ…the sacrifice that made us wholly and holy pleasing to God.

God uses our marriage relationships to mold us more into the image of His Son thereby making us holy.

Dannah Gresh, in Pursuing the Pearl, writes it so well:

Know this, my friend. Satan knows all too well that the most powerful portrait of Christ’s passion is a pure and holy marriage. As Christians continue to misuse sex and succumb to divorce, the whole world comes to understand less of who God is because we understand less of His love as it was meant for us to know it within a faithful, loving, passionate marriage. (Gresh, 2002)

We will have troubles, trials, and temptations in marriage. To think otherwise is to deny the fall of man. However, praise be to the Lord our God that He redeemed our sin and shame by the blood of Jesus and He likewise wants to redeem the union of man and wife to further the gospel to the ends of the earth.

None of us are married to the ultimate Prince Charming or Princess Bride because it is a King that our hearts really desire. When He comes, we at last can live holy and happily ever after.

[1] Jamieson, R., Fausset, A. R., & Brown, D. (1997). Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible (Ge 3:16). Oak Harbor, WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc.

Gresh, D. (2002). Pursuing the Pearl: The Quest for a Pure Passionate Marriage. Chicago: Moody Press.

Brooke Cooney is a pastor's wife, mother of two, and foster-mom of one. To capture the eternal in the everyday, she blogs about family, faith, and lessons along the journey at