As Jesus told this story, the father’s behavior would probably have been more shocking to the listeners than that of his sons. Here are a just a few examples of the father’s unusual behavior: (1) he divided up his estate, even before he was dead, and gave it to his ungrateful kids, (2) he didn’t scold, lecture, order, or nag the younger son about his responsibilities to the family, (3) he let the younger son take the money and run off to certain ruin, (4) he waited and watched for the younger son’s return and, upon seeing him after all that time, ran to him, kissing him and welcoming him back to the fold, (5) he didn’t mention the younger son’s mistakes, and he never once said “I told you so”, and (6) he covered the son’s shame and restored him to his place in the family, even going so far as to have a big party to welcome the rebellious kid back.
Any one of these acts would have been shocking in a patriarchal, first century community, and the fact that the father did all of these things tells us that his foremost concern was for his son’s growth and maturity. He was willing to risk everything – his money, standing in the community, and reputation – to ensure his son became the man he was designed to be. When you understand that the father in the story represents our Heavenly Father, the implications are staggering! Our Father’s concern, first and foremost, is for our redemption. He is willing to endure humiliation, scorn, pain and even death on a cross to win us back to Him. What a Dad!
What else can we learn about parenting from the Prodigal’s Father? First, let me suggest the dad in the story knew that personal experience would be the best teacher for his younger son, as opposed to lectures, orders or nagging. He was willing to sacrifice his personal wealth and comfort to let the son make significant (and poor) choices with his life. Why would the father allow this? Because he knew his words were not reaching this son effectively and that authentic heart change would only come from the boy’s personal experience.
Second, the father let the consequences of the son’s experience teach important life lessons. These consequences were serious – loss of friends and status, poverty and starvation, to name a few. Yet, dad did not ride to the rescue. And, even when the boy came to his senses, repented and returned, the father never said, “I told you so!” That had to be hard, but the father didn’t need to reinforce the lesson. The experience and consequences were enough.
Third, the father let the son know that no matter how foolish, rebellious and angry he had been, he would always be welcomed back to the family. No matter how difficult the situation became, his desire was always for heart change and a restored relationship with the son. That meant the father couldn’t rescue him from the consequences because the lesson would have been lost. But it also meant the father was committed to loving the son wherever he ended up. You can almost hear him saying, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Heb 13:5), even if it meant loving a son working on a pig farm or some other place of ill repute.