The time had come to stop being there for him — at least in this way.

I needed to adopt a different response to my son’s choices. It was time to nip his excuses in the bud, as well as my own excuses for continuing to enable — no matter how subtle. No more would I lay my heart on the chopping block of his uncaring life. It was time for a new set of boundaries, with geographic distance being a key factor.

My son was a fallen human, yet so was I. I had fallen back into old habits of enabling — subtle, yet nonetheless negative and damaging. No longer would I accept the excuses. It was time to go back to the drawing table and revamp the action plan I had developed years before, starting with revised boundaries.

“Lord,” I prayed, “I don’t want to harden my heart, but desire instead to protect it. Please help me to love my son in a way that is also loving to myself. I can’t take this pain anymore. Enough is enough. Please help me to heal my broken heart.”

I was ready to fully address the conflict and the consequences.

I was ready to draw the line in the sand.

I was ready to apply the “N” step in gaining SANITY…”Nip” excuses in the bud.

Are you?

Published May 22, 2009.

If you’re a hurting parent who dearly loves your adult child but longs to see him at last take responsibility for his life, please take a moment to watch the video “But Mom, I’ve Been Busy” (Episode 5) and “Smoke Rises” (Episode 8) on the audio/video page of our web site. It could save your sanity—and maybe even your adult child’s life.