Bizarre things to say and do to a telephone solicitor to get him to hang up and leave you alone:

"So, what are you wearing?"

Talk very quietly and then without warning, scream as loud as you can into the phone.

"You'll have to excuse me now, my armpit is on fire."

"I'm sorry, but this phone is for personal calls only.  The boss won't let us use it for business."

Respond to their questions with fax/modem noises.

"Have you heard about that study showing that it can cause impotence to sit all day with a telephone   receiver next to your head?"

When they ask to speak with you, say "Just a moment," and give the phone to your six-year old child to carry on the conversation.

Pretend to be very interested in their product and then quite calmly and earnestly inquire, "Yes, but can it make a six minute casserole?"

"I am truly sorry but the moon is in the seventh house of Pluto and my astrologer would just die if he knew I  was talking to a salesman during this solar phase."

"This isn't a recording.  This isn't a recording.  This isn't a recording.  This isn't a recording."