My Career As A Clown: Abe Ozo
A Trip to the Dentist: Yin Pain
The Fortuneteller: Reid Palms
Quips For The Young At Heart: Marty Pants
The Monkey Cage: Jim Panzee
Keep 'Em That Way: Private Parts
Leo Tolstoy: Warren Peace
Where to Find Islands: Archie Pelago
The Hidden Surprise: Pam Perz
Imitating Mozart: Sam Phony
Off To Market: Tobias A. Pigg
Girl On a Budget: Penny Pincher
I Say So!: Frank O. Pinion
Plumb Good: Dwayne Pipe
Scottish Kilt Patterns: Glen Pladd
Bad Gardeners: Wilt Plant
The Fall of a Watermelon: S. Platt
String Instruments: Viola Player
I Beat Bobby Fischer: Jess Player
Little Bitty Froggies: Tad Pole
The TV News Anchorman: Maury Ports
Things to Cook Meat In: Stu Potts
House Plants: Clay Potts
Just Say No: Will Power
April Fool!: Sue Prize
Flogging in the Army: Corporal Punishment
The World's Deadliest Joke: Theophilus Punoval
Turtle Racing: Eubie Quick
The Housing Problem: Rufus Quick
The Economy is Recovering!: Knott Quite
Joe Wins at a Track Meet: C. Howie Runns
Not Bogged Down In Reality: Jason Rainbow
Nordic Groundskeepers: Leif Raker
Measles Collision!: Kay Rash
Assault with Battery: Eva Ready
Don't Tread On Me: Amanda B. Reckonwith
Too Rough: Soren Redd
Preaching to Hell's Angels: Pastor Redlight
No: Kurt Reply
Outdoor Activities: Alf Resco
Indiana Jones' Adventures: Darrin Rescue
Eating Disorders: Anna Rexia
Highway Travel: Dusty Rhodes
Bad Investment: Les Riches