More One Liners

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
2. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
3. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" Well, "It's Not Unusual."
4. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
5. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this cow stuff before.
6. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
7. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"
8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
10. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
Originally published August 15, 2004.